Korosensei Never Dies - Rogue_Swordsmith (2024)

Chapter 1: Kill A Little Time

Chapter Text

"Ten billion dollars??" Sapnap's amazed cry startles Quackity out of his tired stupor. Connor and Foolish crowd around Sapnap's desk, babbling with excitement.

"What the f*ck are you on about?" Quackity grumbles, but he can't help peeking over Sapnap's shoulder. The creased document seems to be a bunch of lousy legal drivel.

"Big Q, the price on this guy's head! We'd be set for life!"

Quackity makes a grabby gesture, and Sapnap gives the papers to him. His little gang of three-- (missing Karl, since the bastard had to get himself transferred to a different class)-- gathers around him as he flips through them.

That man's face-- printed in thick, bold strokes on the third page-- clamps a vise around his throat, so tight it constricts the scream he wants to let out. He takes a deep breath. Holds it. Lets it out slowly. "This f*cker??" He tosses the papers away dismissively. "He'll be dead in a day with that bounty." Foolish and Connor scramble to snatch the papers, vying for the prestige of being the first to share with the whole class.

Sapnap, sweet Sapnap, leans over and murmurs worriedly, "You okay, Big Q?"

"f*ck, I'm great!" Hysteria bites in Quackity's laugh. "f*cking hell, I'm- I'm- I'm abso-f*cking-lutely screwed."

"Why?"

"Why?? That's- you know who that is!!" Quackity cries, not caring that the attention of his peers is being drawn to his outburst, like moths to fire, or like vultures to roadkill.

"Yeah, but- yeah, he'll be dead in a day." Sapnap lets Quackity squeeze his hand. "You'll be fine. And if he dares to come anywhere near you, the Ducklings have your back."

Quackity shudders. The thought of his friends going up against the dark shadow from his past fills him with terror. The terror fills him with helpless weakness. Which in turn feeds the vitriolic bitterness rooted deep inside his veins. "N-no, Sapnap. If he comes near, you run."

"Who teh fock are you runnin' from? I wouldn't run. I'd stand there, and I'd fight it. I'd beat the sh*t outta it!" Tommy puffs his chest out as he stomps to his desk beside Quackity's, a sunny ray of cheering bravado. "All the ladies, all the ladies say, there goes a man who beats the sh*t outta what- whatever bothers him."

Quackity laughs, burying the fear and acidic rage. "Aww, Big T, you'd fight a thousand armies for me?"

"What?? No, I'd die."

"You're a good man, Tomathy."

"No man is good, Big Q. No man is good."

The other students have all seated themselves in their assigned desks. There's a new teacher this year. Quackity wishes he'd had time to set up a few more pranks than horseradish sauce in the hand lotion dispenser and whoopee cushions on the teacher's chair. But he's not bad at improvising.

The door opens, and the principal of the school strides in, her fluffy rainbow hair bouncing with every step. "All rise and bow for Captain puss*!!" Tommy cries. Quackity busts a lung, he's laughing so hard.

"T-Tommy, that's- that's not very nice, Tommy." Captain Puffy frowns, tapping her five-inch heels on the grimy linoleum.

"Oh, right. Sorry, Captain." Tommy accepts the reproach with equanimity. "f*cking cold out, am I right, boys?"

"And girl!!" Rose cries from the front of the class.

"Yes, well, I was talking to mah boys." Tommy retorts with exaggerated stiffness.

"f*cking shut up and let the goddamned principal speak!" Quackity cries upon regaining his breath from guffawing. He smiles at Sapnap. The worrywart smiles back gratefully.

"Uh. Thank you, Quackity." Puffy sighs, looking downcast. "I'm sorry, kids. I tried to keep our school out of this. But Skeppy had- uh. The Prezz called in a few favors."

"What's going on?" Tommy asks without raising his hand, because he's just that much of a rebel.

Quackity's neck itches as though he's- being hunted again- no, no, that would never happen here, he's just a regular kid, in a regular school, no war criminals nearby.

But Puffy calls uncertainly to the door, "Mr. Blade?" And Quackity's heart leaps into his throat, choking him with the pounding thump-thump-thump so familiar to prey.

"Yup." Technoblade's low, dry voice resonates through the numbly silent classroom. His shadow darkens the door.

Quackity reaches for Sapnap's hand and squeezes tight. "No-no-no-no-" Sapnap squeezes back, fury beating in his firm pulse. Quackity takes a deep breath. Holds it. Lets it out. His friend is furious for his sake.

Technoblade's clicking steps are the only sound in the quiet, other than Quackity's racing heartbeat. Quackity refuses to look away from Sapnap's hand, refuses to look up at the man who slaughtered his family without a single qualm.

"I guess I'm your teacher or somethin'." A farting noise rips through the tense stillness. Quackity muffles a hysterical giggle; somebody sat on a whoopee cushion. "What a bunch of nerds." Techno's words are lightly spoken, suffocating Quackity with the terrible normalcy of it all.

"Are you the Mr. Blade??" Of all people who could've spoken, it just has to be Tommy, doesn't it.

"I am. Apparently."

"Well, then. I'm going to fockin' beat the sh*t outta you." Tommy's voice is bright and clear, filled with brave anger.

"K." Technoblade answers laconically, seemingly apathetic, but Quackity knows better. The f*cking asshole is just restraining delight at yet another bloody massacre to feed his God with.

"No." Quackity snarls, surprising himself with the loud intensity of his own voice. "Tommy, you're not fighting him."

"But, Big Q-"

"Let me handle this." Quackity flashes a grim smile to Tommy, then glares up at Captain Puffy. "Why are you letting a f*cking terrorist teach highschoolers??"

"I've renounced my violent ways, Quackity." Technoblade's calm retort chills him. "But I wouldn't even be here if it weren't for your government." Anyone else would miss the slight emphasis. Not Quackity.

"It's not my f*cking government. You killed my government, you killed them all!"

"I did what I had to do. For the greater good."

"Um." Captain Puffy raises a hand. "Excuse me. Yes, all of you. Please calm down. We have insurance that makes it impossible for Technoblade to harm any of you-"

"A hostage, you mean." Rage flickers beneath Technoblade's calm tone.

A vengeful grin cracks across Quackity's dour face. "Oh... Techno, we're going to have so much fun." He dares to turn his gaze on the muzzled murderer.

The man is smaller than he remembered. Paler. Thinner. His silky platinum hair cascades over his shoulders, braided haphazardly, with hints of pink dye streaking the tips. Technoblade doesn't smile, doesn't make any perceivable expression at all. Quackity stares him down, shooting every drop of vitriol he can muster.

Technoblade winces, almost imperceptibly, and breaks eye contact. Battle won. A surge of euphoric power floods Quackity with confidence. "Yo, I'm going to f*cking kill you."

"You can try." Technoblade smiles.

"You're just a human, Technoblade. Terrifying? Yeah, sure. But your days are f*cking numbered and I'm the one who's going to take your goddamn life."

"Uh, actually." Puffy interrupts again. "That's the thing."

"What is??"

"You're all going to have to try your best to kill him before the year is out." Puffy says in a rush.

Quackity scoffs, but before he can say anything, Techno raises a hand. "See, there's the catch, Quackity." His form glitches. "I'm not actually a Human."

Quackity gulps down his apprehension as the piggy monster in Technoblade's chair stares him down. "What are you, then??"

"I dunno. Maybe I'll think of a name before my tragic end."

Puffy sighs. "Drama kings. Okay, big guy, I'm going to, uhh, yeah, I have work to do. Y'all have fun." She leaves the stricken class with the monster.

Technoblade scratches at the horny protusions wrapping around his head like a crown. The glowing irises inside his black sclera dance around the classroom, landing on each student before leaping away again. His pig-muzzle wrinkles. Tusks curl out from his jaws. The blood-red cloak pinned around his shoulders hides most of his bulk. If he was scary before, he's f*cking terrifying now.

"A f*cking pig-man?? That's what you are??"

"Eh." Technoblade grunts noncommittally. "You should see the other guys."

Quackity frowns. "Why us?"

"Huh?"

"Why does the government want us to kill you??"

"Because I told them I wouldn't let myself be killed unless they let me teach a class." Technoblade the pig-monster smiles reminiscingly. "And then I killed my captors to prove the point. The Prezz thinks he can keep me under control because I wouldn't dare hurt a child... his words, not mine." His eyes twinkle. "I'm perfectly fine with dropkicking kids, particularly if it's in self-defense."

Gulping, Quackity shrinks a bit in his chair. Against his will, the years-old wild laughter of the bloody former-human rings through his head once more. He'll never be rid of the ecstatic sound, never be rid of the dread that poisoned his veins as he hid while Technoblade obliterated his home. Blood for the Blood God... His breath comes short and fast.

Sapnap squeezes his hand comfortingly. The fire blazing in his best friend's eyes tells Quackity that Sapnap won't just step aside and let Technoblade hurt him again.

"That's f*ckin' cruel!" Tommy pipes up. "You're a f*ckin' menace, yeah. Boys, I say we take him down before anyone gets hurt."

"You can try."

Tommy snatches the shank slipped to him by Tubbo. "You're going down, you are!"

Quackity stands up hastily and holds Tommy back before he can storm up to the implacable monster. "Big T, sit the f*ck down, you're just going to get hurt."

"I'll decide who gets hurt, thanks." Tommy retorts. "Techno, you're not going to hurt my friends."

"See, Tommy, I can't really do that anyway." Technoblade growls. "But if I could, do you really think that measly pin could take me down?"

"We'll f*ckin' see!!" Tommy rips himself from Quackity's grasp and leaps froggy-like over Hannah's desk.

Quackity can only watch in horror as Technoblade doesn't even to bother standing up. The monster deflects Tommy's first wild slash. "Tommy, that's a piercing weapon."

"I f*ckin' know that, I'm trying to shank you with it!"

"Tommy, you're doing it wrong." Technoblade sighs, starting to sound exasperated as Tommy fails swing after swing.

"Tell me how to kill you, then!"

"You can't." Technoblade spreads his arms. "Go ahead, try."

Quackity gasps with delight as Tommy stabs the shank into Technoblade's chest. But Tommy screeches and lets go of the shank. The metal boils and melts into Technoblade's skin.

"Wh-what the hell??" Tubbo leaps up and drags the stunned Tommy back to his desk.

"The f*ck was that??" Quackity cries, desperate to regain some semblance of control.

"That? Merely a side effect."

"Of what??"

"Of being the first Mutant Earth has ever seen." Technoblade smiles unpleasantly. "And the last to ever exist. Make no mistake. If I am not killed by this time next year, your Earth will be in as many pieces as the Moon."

Chapter 2: Sleep When You're Dead

Chapter Text

The class absorbs the threat, stunned, hushed. Quackity clenches his fists. "Why the f*ck would you do that?" His defiance shatters the silence.

"Because I can." Technoblade replies dismissively. "But I am here to teach, so please, open your textboo-"

"No." Quackity smirks, wearing a confidence he doesn't feel. "Why would you destroy the Earth? You're immortal, sure, but you seem like the kind of guy who's easily bored. What would you have left after your little temper tantrum?"

One floppy ear flicks irritably. "You see, the idea is, I'd die as well."

"If you want to die so f*cking bad, why don't you just let us kill you, asshole?"

"That kinda defeats the purpose of the threat. You see, you're completely correct in your assessment. I am bored." Technoblade's light yet nearly monotone voice grates on Quackity's nerves. "I'm simply too good. Unbeatable, even. I've searched and searched, but haven't found a single worthy foe."

"So you failed!" Quackity crows, slamming his fist on the desk. Psychological warfare, baby.

Tommy takes up the jeer as well, "You failed, big man, ho, ho!! Eat sh*t!"

Technoblade scowls and buries his muzzle in the thick textbook. "Why don't we move on. Page three-hundre-"

"Move on?? Move on?? You killed my family, Technoblade, you f*cking killed them all! I can't f*cking move on from that!" Quackity snarls.

Exhaustion leaks from Technoblade's glower. "I've killed many families, Quackity. All for one goal."

"f*ck you and your motherf*cking anarchy!! You think I'm scared of you?? I- I-" The words choke in Quackity throat as Technoblade stands up. He shrinks in his seat.

"Stay away from him." Sapnap growls.

Technoblade ignores the students completely, instead turning to the whiteboard and picking up a marker. "History is not circular."

"What's the f*cking point." Quackity grumbles under his breath. There's no winning against a man who'd have no qualms about punting him.

"Nor is it straight."

"Pfft, knew it. Now everyone who hates history will get cancelled for being hom*ophobic." Tommy somehow manages to both lighten the mood and make everything worse at the same time.

Technoblade doesn't get angry or annoyed, however. "Heh. History is pretty gay, not gonna lie. It's also-" He steps away from his crude drawing of a squiggly line, "a helix. History repeats itself in stages. Anyone want to guess why?"

Tommy leans back in his chair. "Because you're f*cking dumb, that's why."

"Ranboo?" Technoblade addresses the creepy, quiet boy huddled over his desk in the back of the class.

"Uh- well-"

"Nothing ever stays the same, big guy." Tubbo interjects. "It's not as simple as stuffing it all into a one dimensional form. Who's to say it's even a line at all?"

Technoblade shrugs. "Fair, fair. Why don't y'all discuss."

With that, most of the tension in the room dissolves as everyone collectively agrees to pretend everything is okay. Groups form as students gravitate towards their friends. Chatter fills the former silence. Quackity forces himself to join in faking normalcy. But nothing about this is normal.

He can't kill Technoblade through sheer strength. But he could easily outwit him. The gears spin in his mind, working out a plot.

The first week has gone by uneventfully. Nobody's tried to kill Technoblade yet, who in turn has behaved like a responsible teacher, refraining from punting anyone. It's so boring.

The last class of Friday ends with the bell, and the kids file out. Technoblade ignores the bitter glares from the little "gang" that calls themselves Ducklings. They haven't attempted anything yet, and Technoblade doubts they'll ever find the guts to actually go through with their plots. Pity, really.

Tommy remains behind, trying to shoo Tubbo, who refuses to leave him. "Teacher!" Tommy stomps up to Techno and slams his notebook on the desk. He's a blustery scamp, but Technoblade has seen how he brightens the classroom and helps his peers.

"Tommy."

"Let me kill you."

"Us." Tubbo corrects.

"Let us kill you or else."

"Or what?"

"Or I'll fail all my classes." Tommy grins, seeming confident he's found a bargaining chip. "And I'll tell everyone else to fail theirs, too. You'll be known as the worst f*cking teacher to have ever teachered!"

"We fail all our classes, anyway, big man, that's not much of a threat." Tubbo deadpans. "We are the loser class, after all."

"Shut up, we're not the f*cking loser class. I'm trying to threaten him!"

Technoblade shrugs. "You think I care?"

"You've gotta. You're our teacher, after all."Tommy crosses his arms, puffing his chest out.

"K." Technoblade doesn't smile. "I'm afraid I can't just let you kill me."

"Then prepare to be failed upon!"

"But." Techno holds up a hand. "But, if you try to pass your classes, I will teach you how to kill me. Deal?"

Tubbo pipes up, "That will be adequate. Come on, Tommy."

Technoblade waits until both are out of the classroom. He doesn't feel guilty at all. What should he feel guilty for, after all? Simmering rage burns in his chest, a constant companion to the acid in his mind.

Next class, he promises himself. Next class, the training will begin. He'll be one step closer to achieving his goals.

Technoblade rises and lets his human form melt away. The voices in his head scream, as they always have, as they always will, hundreds of thousands of souls trapped in here with him. His eyes-- all millions of them-- blink open as his hundreds of wings unfurl. Anyone who could see him now might name him a beast or an angel, and either could be correct. But Technoblade knows both are false promises. Humans can't create beasts or angels, after all.

Demons, however, are apparently a different matter.

Ranboo only went back to get his notebook. He can't forget his notebook; that is the one thing he's not allowed to forget. Shadows seep from every corner of the classroom. He shivers in the chilled air as he hastily scrambles to his desk.

His book isn't in his desk. Where is it?? He can't lose it. He rummages in the desk frantically. Where is it, where is it, where is it??

The window creaks, and Ranboo yelps, leaping away from the sudden draft. "Wh-who's there?"

"Hey." The kind voice greets him from the darkness. "You're here late."

"I- I just- uhh, who are you?"

"Who am I?" The voice echoes chidingly.

"I- uhh, I'm Ranboo." He backs away to the door. On the floor, silver glints in a shaft of moonlight. The spiral of his notebook. Crap. The shadowed form leaps silently into the classroom and kneels to pick up the book. Crap, crap. "Uh- that's- that's mine, actually."

"Is it, now?" The gentle mockery in his tone sets Ranboo on edge.

"Yes, actually, so- so give it back. Please?"

The mysterious form opens Ranboo's book and flips through it. "Interesting. Alright." He hands it back to Ranboo, who snatches it and scrambles for the door. "Actually, Ranboo, I wanted to talk to you."

The words yank Ranboo to a halt. He wants to retort, he wants to say no, he wants to leave, but instead he turns back meekly. "Okay?"

"You're in class 3-E."

"Y-yeah...?"

"Good. That's good. Do you want your teacher to die?"

"Huh?" Ranboo tenses, confused by the seeming non sequitor. "I- I mean." Does he want Technoblade to die? Does he want anyone to die, for that matter? "N-not necessarily?"

"Hm. Good answer."

"Who are you?" Ranboo gathers what little courage he has and steps back towards the door.

"You, hm, you can call me Dream." The man steps out of the shadows. The mask over his face grins eerily at Ranboo. "I've got a proposition for you, Ranboo."

"Metal melts in the bastard's skin, so anything with metal is a f*cking waste of time." Quackity spreads the pages of his plan over the tree-house's table.

"Maybe he's a vampire." Karl offers, sitting on the table and messing up Quackity's perfect layout. "Try wood stakes and garlic."

"Vampires aren't real, dumbass." Connor rolls his eyes.

"Well, neither are immortal pig-men mutants, but here we are."

"He's not a vampire. Maybe try something for werewolves? Silver?" Sapnap joins in, swinging on the hammock.

"He's not a f*cking werewolf!" Quackity shoves Karl off the table. "Or a vampire. He's a motherf*cking terrorist, that asshole is, and we need to f*cking kill him!"

"Language!!" The screech from the roof of the treehouse freezes everyone in place.

"Karl." Quackity says calmly. "Who the f*ck did you invite to our secret hideout?"

"Nobody!" Karl cries.

"Connor?"

"He said he'd bring co*ke!" Connor cries.

A short man dressed in goth black and red accents drops through the window and smiles at the Ducklings. "I did, but the cans burst on the way."

"Not soda-"

"Language!!" The man cries again, shushing Connor. "You kids shouldn't mess with bad stuff, anyway."

"We don't." Quackity shoots a glare at Connor. "Anyway, it's none of your f*cking business. Why the f*ck are you here?? What do you want??"

"I, uhh, just thought I'd help with your problem." The man grins. "You want to kill your teacher, right?"

"Yeah? But-"

"Well, there you go! I can help you! Name's Bad, by the way. Badboyhalo."

"How can you help? And what do you want in return??"

"Oh, hmm, how about seventy-five percent of the bounty."

"Deal." Twenty-five percent of ten billion is still more than enough, and Quackity would prefer revenge on Technoblade over riches, anyway. "How do we kill him?"

"I've got associates working on that tiny problem. We stole- uh, developed a way to hurt him temporarily, but he can't be killed unless you hit his heart, and his regen powers are too strong to let you reach that with any weapons we currently possess."

"How the f*ck do you know all this??"

Bad smirks. "Social networking."

Ranboo paces in the chilly alleyway, reading and re-reading his book as shivers wrack his body. He found it. Good. Everything is fine, now. He's fine.

He shuts out the uneasiness caused by the blurry darkness over his memories. He's never had a good memory, which is why he has this book in the first place.

He huddles in the corner of the grimy alley to complete his homework, and wonders briefly why there's a second notebook in his backpack also marked 'Do Not Read'. Maybe he forgot he already had one. No worries. It's fine.

Everything is fine.

"Class." Technoblade greets his students as they file in. Quackity glares at the monster. He's in his piggy form today, his cloak swishing across the ground.

"Rise." Tommy calls out the traditional honor given to teachers. But the class hadn't done this before for Technoblade. Quackity glances around at his fellow students, who all seem just as confused. He stands up. The others hesitantly follow his lead.

"Bow." Tommy sets the example of a shallow bow. Then he straightens and draws a revolver. "Lock on!"

Quackity stares as Tubbo, Eret, and Wilbur also draw out guns and take aim on Technoblade.

"Heh??" Technoblade chuffs in confusion.

"Target on Korosensei!" Tommy snaps out the order. "Fire!"

"Korosensei??" Quackity's disbelieving laugh is drowned out by the ringing cracks of the guns and the shrill shrieks of students.

"HEH??" Technoblade chuffs again amidst the chaos.

"All stop!" Tommy barks. The gunfire ceases.

Completely unharmed, Technoblade stares at his class, a tusky smile cracking across his muzzle. "For your first assassination attempt, that was four stars, kids."

"Wow, that's really good!" Tubbo cheers and high-fives Tommy.

"Out of ten."

"Oh. Awww, come on, we deserve some credit for actually getting guns!"

"You missed. And you ruined my whiteboard."

"That's your fault, innit, though, big man. If you'd've taken the bullets, the whiteboard would be alright."

"That's true, that's true." Technoblade's smile fades into a scowl. "But you also put your classmates in danger."

"They could've asked us what the plan was." Wilbur hums. "It's really their fault for sitting between us and you. And therefore it's your fault for assigning their seats there."

"True." Eret agrees, readjusting their flower crown. "It's all Korosensei's fault."

Philza walks beside Ponk as the guard escorts him through the compound. "What happened?" He asks, faking calm.

"Technoblade added another term to our deal." President Skeppy walks backwards in front of Philza. Beside him, Awesamdude keeps a hand on his holstered revolver.

"Did he."

"He wants his class trained for assassination. In return, he told us his weakness."

"Hm." Philza smiles, hiding the whirlwind of chaos and bloodlust behind his eyes. "Pog."

Chapter 3: Leave Them In Shreds

Chapter Text

Quackity stumbles into the classroom, exhaustion dragging on his eyes. The silence of the room almost deafens him. He yawns and slouches into the desk beside Sapnap's. "Sup, mothers and f*ckers of the court."

"And they have the gall to call me late." Technoblade sighs. "Quackity, you missed first period."

"Just get on with the motherf*cking class." Quackity grumbles, his head on the desk. And when did he get so comfortable with talking back? He wonders about it briefly, then scrunches his eyes and tries to block out the oceans of hatred beating through his skin.

"You good, mate?" An unfamiliar voice chuckles from the front of the class.

Quackity looks up at the new guy- two new guys. "Who the f*ck are you?"

"This is Philza." Technoblade's dry tone almost hides the notes of fondness. "He'll be teaching you how to kill me."

"The lessons will be applicable in later life, I guarantee." The skinny man with ragged blond hair must be Philza. He slouches unconcernedly beside the other, heavily armed, fellow. "Oh, and this is Punz. He's my guard. He'll help me with demonstrations."

"However, the deal is that you will all attempt to at least get a C in every class." Technoblade adds.

"Who agreed to that f*cking sh*tass deal??" Quackity cries. "You think we couldn't get A's if we tried?? None of us give a f*ck about school, that's why Puffy stuffed us all together here!"

"Hm. You make a good point, Quackity. Get all A's in every class by the end of the first semester, and Philza here will tutor you in the art of assassination."

Quackity feels his fellow students glaring at him. "It's a f*cking deal, baby! You're as good as dead!" This, added to Bad's smuggled weapons, should be enough to level the playing field.

Lunchtime rolls around, and Quackity learns from Sapnap that Punz and Philza have been employed by the school ostensibly to teach extracurriculars like Sociology and Martial Arts. He demolishes his food as Sapnap and Foolish argue over the best way to go about attacking Technoblade with their new weapons.

At the front of the class, Technoblade cleans off the whiteboard. Hannah Rose, the only girl in class 3-E, sits alone at her desk. Quackity watches her for a moment, considering whether he should let her join his group or not.

His mind is just about made up to beckon her over when she stands up and produces a second lunchbox and thermos from her backpack. Placing both on Technoblade's desk, she scrawls a little note, and then returns to her seat.

Technoblade turns around, sees the food and tea, and makes a little "Heh?" sound of confusion. Quackity glowers at Rose. She tilts her head and glances at him with a mysterious smile.

The rest of the day passes as uneventfully as it possibly could with having a terrorist, hostage, and military guard as teachers. Punz has declared his intent to teach Mathematics for the rest of the year after Technoblade started ranting about the economy while attempting to explain trigonometry. Quackity has a feeling the rant was partially a bait for that very purpose, but then again, he's grown used to Technoblade's rambling segways from the actual topic of discussion.

The situation has started to feel almost normal. A simple fact of life. The truth is that people adapt to their environments. As Quackity follows Sapnap out of the classroom, he shoots one last glare at Technoblade, almost a tradition of sorts.

Technoblade meets his eyes and gives him a subtle nod before returning his attention to whatever Philza is on about. Quackity scoffs and hurries to catch up to his friends.

Clubs have started to form for the year. But, cut off from the rest of the highschool by both merit of their reputations as delinquents and the threat of their teacher, class 3-E can't join in any official clubs. So they've made their own.

The Ducklings plus Charlie have formed the Prank club. Tommy, Tubbo, Eret, and Wilbur made the Theatre club. Ranboo and Rose remain separately aloof. Foolish reports to Quackity that Rose disappeared into the Chemistry lab a bit ago, and Ranboo has just been wandering the forest line surrounding the building.

Charlie, as Head Prankster, proposes going over to the main grounds and pranking the other classes. The Ducklings agree on the condition they steal Karl from his club.

When they reach the main grounds of the high school, a mile away from the secluded building for class 3-E, Connor whines about his twisted ankle as Foolish carries him. Quackity drags his feet on the clean linoleum, smirking at the disdainful glances of passing students.

"Well, if it isn't the loser class." Jack Manifold crosses his arms and stands in the middle of the hallway. "Come to beg for scraps, have you?"

"Out of our way, Jack." Charlie snarls.

Jack adjusts his heterochromatic sunglasses. "Niki and I have a proposition."

"What the f*ck do you assholes want with us?"

"Give us a cut of the money when you kill that dumb teacher and we'll help you study for college admissions. Win-win." Jack grins.

Quackity gestures for his gang to discuss. "Yo, we don't need that prick."

Sapnap nods. "We're already splitting the winnings with Bad, we don't need another reduction."

"Wait, who's Bad??" Charlie hisses. Quackity shoves him out of the circle.

"We could always take the help and then not pay him. Like, as a prank." Foolish suggests.

"Good idea. In favor?"

Connor and Sapnap agree. The motion passes.

"Alright, Jack, we'll f*cking take it."

"Nice. Okay, we want fifty percent of the bounty in return for our splendid, magnanimous help." Jack puffs out his chest.

"Deal." Quackity spits in his hand and holds it out for Jack to shake. The boy looks disgusted.

"Ew, I'm not touching that."

"Deal or no deal?" Quackity grins, watching Jack squirm.

"For the love of Newton, Jack!" Niki Nihachu storms out of the nearby empty classroom, her pink hair pinned up in a messy bun. "It's a deal." She spits on her own hand and takes Quackity's without flinching.

"Great, now piss off. We have club business to attend to." Quackity shoulders past Jack, and his club follows.

"How are you planning to kill the Blade??" Niki trots to keep up.

"Secret."

"I want to kill him, too!"

"Join the f*cking club."

"Rude! I'm offering help!"

Quackity shrugs at her. "I just told you, join the club. Fail your classes to get transferred into 3-E, then we'll talk."

"I- I will!" Niki cries, then storms back to Jack and drags him away.

"Can I kill him for you?"

Philza glances at the mercenary guard in question. "Mate." He chuckles darkly. "I won't stop you, but he could be useful."

Punz, oblivious to Techno's bloodlust, cleans up the shattered glass on the scorched floor of the Chemistry lab as one of the students cries in a corner. Fake. Philza can spot crocodile tears from a mile away.

"Techno, you didn't eat the lunch she gave you, did you?"

Techno shrugs. "It was a good attempt. Five stars."

Philza laughs a bit. "What's arsenic taste like, then?"

Technoblade glances at the crying girl. "Eh, nothing much."

The girl sobs harder, clearly attempting to play the sympathy card. "I- I didn't p-poison it, it wasn't m-mine." Lies. All lies.

"K." Techno scratches his head and turns away, uncomfortable with the tears.

A knife whistles through the air and buries in Techno's shoulder. He gasps a pained, "Heh??" And he grips the smoke wound as the metal melts and sizzles.

"Techno? You good, mate?"

Keen steel digs into his back. "Don't move." Rose says, adrenaline making her voice tremble.

Punz laughs in the background. "Nice job, kiddo. Now, twist one arm behind his back, and force him to back away from the Blade."

Philza sighs as Rose does as Punz ordered. "Rose, mate, you don't want to be a murderer."

"You won't be my first kill." Rose retorts in a tremulous attempt at a cold voice.

"Technoblade, hands up." Punz comes around in Philza's peripheral vision. "Try anything and my associate will stab the old man."

"Hey!" Philza cries. "Watch your tongue, motherf*cker, I'm not f*cking old!" He just could kill the girl and let Techno take out Punz, but Techno has already told him to leave the students alone.

"Phil?" Techno says in a low, furious voice. His wound has already healed. "I'll take care of this." The blade against Philza's skin trembles, then steadies.

Punz smirks and draws his gun. "You'll take care of this, will you? I've got the biggest payday of my life waiting for your death."

"You've caused enough suffering." Rose snarls. "It ends here."

"Phil is innocent. Let him go." Technoblade growls.

"Not unless you let us kill you. You made a big mistake, and now you're going to pay."

"And we're going to get paid!" Rose laughs.

"Rose, kid, let go and run before you get hurt." Philza warns.

"That would be smart, yes." Techno remains motionless.

"Stay there, Rose." Punz snaps. "Don't move. We've got them."

"Ha, the only thing stopping me from punting both of you into the sun is Techno." Phil yawns.

"I could kill you!" Rose presses the dagger between Philza's shoulderblades. "Don't try me."

"If you kill him, what's stopping me from killing both of you?" Techno muses. "Rose, let Phil go, get outta here, and I'll forget this ever happened."

"Don't listen to him." Punz urges.

"You don't stand a chance, buddy." Philza grins mockingly at Punz. This is exciting. Philza hasn't felt so alive since he was burning down cathedrals with Techno.

A smoke grenade drops in-between the four. It shudders on the ground. Philza barks to startle Punz and Rose, "Scatter!"

Punz leaps away. Techno jumps for Phil. Rose lets go and shoves Phil into Techno. Smoke poofs out and fills the entire room.

Techno throws Philza over his shoulder and storms for the door as Phil coughs out the burning air. As they reach clear air, Philza laughs. "Not even close, ey, mate?"

Techno's eyes are dark as he growls, "Never again." A threat. A promise.

Ranboo stares at his empty hands. The smell of smoke lingers on his clothes. What was he doing? He can't remember. That's nothing new, though. He doesn't want to remember.

He staggers shakily through the forest, unable to recall why he's here. Why is he here, so near the school? He opens his book and flips to page two, the day Technoblade joined the school. Right, right, he's supposed to be helping everyone kill Techno.

Was that what he was doing? He can't remember.

"Alright, nerds." Technoblade slams a fist on his desk. The chatter abruptly ceases, leaving the air tense and cold. "If anybody, and I mean anybody, so much as looks at Philza the wrong way, so much as harms one hair on his head, I punt first and ask no questions ever."

He doesn't even glance at her, but Hannah Rose shrinks in her chair anyway, regretting ever choosing the front row for her seat assignment. She could have done it, she could have gotten rid of Technoblade, if it weren't for the damn smoke bomb.

"Who teh f*ck tried to kill Philza??" Tommy cries, somehow sounding more incensed than Technoblade.

"Punz." Technoblade replies. Rose frowns in confusion. Why wouldn't he tell them about her involvement? He certainly has no reason to hide it.

"I'll kill him!!" Tommy barks, gesturing with his knife haphazardly. "Where is he??"

"He met an unfortunate accident and is now recovering in the hospital." Technoblade deadpans.

Rose wonders if she should feel bad that her former partner got hurt. She doesn't. He wasn't a friend, he was a business associate. He even blamed her for the failure of their attempt. So f*ck him.

"Good. Serves the f*cker right." Wilbur hums. "Philza, we're going to try to kill your friend, sorry, but you're safe with us."

"Killing friends is not cool, Wilbur, I'm trying to be cool." Tommy complains, brushing back his hair.

"Tommy, we kinda need to kill Techno. Again, sorry about that, Philza."

"f*ck you, bitch!" Tommy retorts.

"Kids, kids. Chill." Philza chuckles. He smiles at Rose for a moment, then turns his attention back to Tommy and Wilbur, who have devolved into slapping each other with notebooks. The look leaves her confused and angry. She was going to kill him. Why isn't he respecting that??

"Tubbo, please sit between your friends so they stop hitting each other." Philza snaps as the playfight grows louder.

"With pleasure." Tubbo grins.

A few minutes into the start of class, Tommy yelps. "Tubbo!!"

"Wilbur paid me to."

A few minutes later, Wilbur cries, "Ow, hey!"

"Tommy paid me more."

Rose snaps and turns around, leveling a glare at Tubbo. "How much do I need to pay you to make your friends shut the hell up??"

"Ten." Tubbo holds out his hand. Rose stuffs a tenner in his hand and turns back around, huffing.

"T-Tubbo, put away the duck tape!!" Tommy cries. "Eret, no, don't help him, help me!! Phiiilza!!"

"Kids, will you just shut up and f*cking learn something??"

Hannah spots Quackity in the third row, sitting beside Sapnap and glaring up at Technoblade. He hasn't spoken once the entire time.

A movement from Ranboo catches her gaze from all the way in the back of the class, beside the window. He smiles nervously, not meeting her eyes as he stuffs a kitty-decor notebook back into his backpack. She's seen him with it often, in every class, and it doesn't seem to be for regular notes. She saw the cover once. It was marked 'Do Not Read', which only makes her want to read it.

"Hey, Rose." Eret steals her attention with a wave. "I heard you know martial arts. Can you teach me?"

Ponk grumbles to himself as he strides up the stairs to the small, rundown building that houses class 3-E. He was supposed to begin teaching here at the start of the year, but he got delayed by family issues. His substitute should be gone by now, but if they aren't, he'll get rid of them soon enough.

He opens the door to absolute chaos. Two kids are firing guns at the substitute teacher, who just sits there and takes it as he munches a sandwich. Another man demonstrates to a small group the correct method for throwing knives. Still others are crowded in the center of circled desks and wrestling as a girl criticizes their techniques. And in the back corner, scrawling in a notebook, is the only normal person there. Ponk makes a beeline for him.

"Hey." Ponk sits beside the normal person.

"Hey." The normal person replies in a growly and annoyed voice.

"What's with the chaos?"

"You get used to it."

"Oh. I don't think I want to."

The ?normal? person looks at Ponk's forehead. "Then leave."

Ponk shivers and excuses himself hastily.

But before he reaches the door, he stops himself. No. He's not going to give in so easily. He's the teacher here. When the gunfire ceases to reload, Ponk storms up to the substitute and slams his boot on the- on his desk. "Out of my seat."

"Nah."

Ponk stares at the piggy-mutant man. "What the hell, man? What are you??"

"Some would say I'm death incarnate." The man says in a tired voice.

"Would they, really??"

"Nah. They're already dead."

Ponk glowers. "I'm the teacher here."

"K. Ponk, right?"

"Yeah?"

"Right. Well, hate to break it to you, but I'm the head teacher now. I guess you can help out, though. Not that I need help."

"Right." Ponk groans.

"How good are you at teaching math?"

Chapter 4: Get Lost In The Dark

Chapter Text

"Rise!" Tommy barks out. Quackity winks at Sapnap as he reaches for the weapons supplied by Bad. "Bow!" Quackity refuses to give even a shallow nod to Technoblade. The bastard doesn't deserve respect. "Lock on!"

"Duck, motherf*ckers!!" Quackity laughs and raises both revolvers, firing both in rapid succession. The unnaturally quiet explosions don't prepare him at all for the powerful recoils, and his weapons nearly fly from his hands. "f*ck!" He adjusts his grip on both and fires again and again.

Beside him, Sapnap has dropped to the floor and now crawls under the desks, a dagger in one hand. Tommy's team fires their useless guns at the same time as the Ducklings; they're providing a useful distraction, so Quackity forgives the noise.

At the back of the class, Philza laughs, seeming unconcerned for the safety of his friend. Technoblade simply takes the bullets, scowling at the class. He catches one bullet in his fingers and crushes it. The gunfire peters out.

Quackity growls in frustration as he reloads his revolvers. The special bullets did nothing. f*ck Badboyhalo and his f*cking useless equipment.

"K, if you're done, we have a quiz to get to."

"f*ck you." Quackity snarls. "Just die already!"

"Nah." Technoblade picks up one of the bullets and inspects it. "Heh? Which one of you is working with the Hunters?"

"The f*ck are you talking about??"

"Die!" Sapnap leaps from the floor and slashes at Technoblade's arm.

Technoblade deflects the blow, knocking the dagger from Sapnap's hand. Sapnap reveals a grenade and pulls the pin, leaping at Technoblade.

"Sapnap!!" Quackity shrieks, cold with horrified disbelief.

The next seconds blur together. Sapnap has a grip on Technoblade's cloak and releases the grenade's handle, shoving it against the monster's chest. But then Sapnap flies back with a shocked yelp, landing on Quackity in an undignified heap. A muffled explosion detonates; the class screams, shouts; all the noise hurts.

"You motherf*cking idiot, what the hell were you thinking??" Quackity hugs Sapnap tight, afraid to let go lest the stupid lug find a new way to get himself killed.

"Sorry, Quackity." Sapnap says in a breathless, stunned laugh. "I wanted to avenge your family."

"Don't make me avenge you, too!" Quackity untangles himself from Sapnap and brushes the dust out of his friend's hair. "You f*cking idiot, you would've died!"

"Two stars." Techno intones, his voice hoarse and pained. Did he seriously eat the grenade?? "For an exceedingly stupid suicide attempt."

Sapnap glowers sullenly at the ground as he sits back down. Quackity glares at the bullet-pocked whiteboard behind Technoblade.

Techno saved Sapnap's life. He could have let the boy die, could have let his other students be injured by the shrapnel. None of the weapons supplied by Bad did anything. Techno wouldn't have been harmed by the grenade. So why? Why the hell would he save Sapnap??

"K, since you kids seem determined to not have any common sense at all, I'm goin' to lay down a few ground rules for assassinations." Techno picks up a marker, stares at the ruined whiteboard, then puts the marker down again. "One, no explosives anywhere near yourselves or other students."

"Why do you care, big man?" Tubbo asks brightly.

"I don't, but it's rather inconvenient if I have to explain to President Skeppy that he shouldn't pull the kill switch on my only friend because you kids were dumb enough to blow yourselves up." Technoblade glowers at everyone in the class. "Two, poisons and toxins don't work, so don't even bother. Three, outside help is allowed as long as you don't endanger Philza or your fellow students."

"Wait, kill switch?? What's a f*cking kill switch??" Tommy slams his fist on the desk.

"A bomb, mate." Philza says lightly. "There's a bomb in my chest that can go off at any time Skeppy chooses."

"That's majorly f*cked up." Tommy glares at nobody in particular.

"I like bombs. They're fun to make." Tubbo says, completely unprompted.

Quackity just sits in silence and tries to process the events, the situation, the emotions. It's all a confusing mess.

At the end of the day, the students file out of their classroom. Quackity remains in his seat, gesturing for Sapnap and the Ducklings to go on without him. He gathers his courage.

"Techno." He says, his voice shaking despite his best efforts to be tough and intimidating.

"Quackity." Techno replies without intonation, busy grading quizzes.

"f*ck you for killing my parents." Quackity snarls in a rush of heady adrenaline. "But- but I guess I should be motherf*cking grateful you saved Sapnap. That- that was f*cking decent of you."

Technoblade looks up, meeting Quackity's glare with brightly glowing irises. "You are completely justified in hating me. I'm not going to pretend I've ever been a good person."

"Why do you hurt people??"

"Because, Quackity. I have goals. And certain people stand in the way of those goals. The only universal language is violence."

"That- that's f*cking bullsh*t." Quackity stands up, anger pounding in his throat. "My parents never did anything wrong to you."

"They were the government, Quackity. And all governments are inherently corrupt."

"Are- are you going to kill me, too??"

"Why would I do that? Your government has been disbanded. Any inheritance you may have is to a broken, obliterated system."

"Are you going to kill President Skeppy?" Quackity snaps, hungry for answers, curious to see the extent of Technoblade's ambitious anarchy.

Technoblade smiles. The unpleasant look doesn't reach his eyes. "Oh, his fate was sealed the moment he entered office."

President Skeppy paces in his office. His time is running out. "Sam, I need your help."

Awesamdude stands stiffly in the corner. "What do you need?"

"They're pressuring me, Sam. It's hard enough to keep the leaks away from the press!"

"I told you not to hire Hbomb."

"How could I know he'd be a security risk??" Skeppy snaps, shoving a pile of paperwork onto the floor.

"I told you, sir."

"Shut up, shut up. I'm trying to think." Skeppy leaps to stand on top of his desk.

"Don't hurt yourself."

"Oh!!" Skeppy snaps his fingers. "I want you to lock it down."

"Sir?"

"Lockdown, Sam! Nobody gets into Erinome, nobody gets out! No f*cking vigilantes are taking my glory."

"Sir, the students-"

"They won't be able to kill it. Our labs are working on this day and night, they're bound to come up with something!! I'll neutralize the threat, and then I'll be heralded as the best president ever!" Skeppy swoons onto his velvet chair.

"That wasn't exactly what I meant. Won't they be in danger?"

Annoyed, Skeppy waves a dismissive hand. "That's why you'll be there. Put a perimeter down. Do your secret agenty stuff."

"I still doubt the wisdom of this plan."

Skeppy sighs loudly. "Just do it." Somebody knocks at the door. "Come in!"

Schlatt steps inside, wearing a grin as stylishly as the cleanly pressed bow tie around his neck. "Heyy."

"Schlatt!" Skeppy leaps up. "You're just who I wanted to see!"

"Of course I am, baby."

"Sam, you're dismissed." Skeppy waits for Awesamdude to salute and leave the room. "Schlatt, how much time do we have??"

"Not enough." Schlatt plops on the table and opens one of the drawers to pull out a bottle. He glugs the whiskey. "I'm telling ya, this wouldn't even be an issue if you'd let my men do what they were supposed to."

Skeppy glowers. "It wouldn't have been an issue if you'd just left Techno on death row instead of- instead of poking him with needles or whatever the hell you did!"

"Heh. You like it, don't lie to me, babe. The destruction. The mayhem. A world-ending threat only you can stop. It's right down your alley."

Skeppy picks up a pencil and chews on the tip. "It is pretty epic."

"There you go. Now don't f*cking interfere with my work again." Schlatt wobbles off the desk and stumbles to the door. "Keep in touch, baby."

"Hey."

Three men block Ranboo's path in the forest. They're all shorter than him, but he still feels intimidated.

"H-hey. How can I help you?"

"You ever seen this dude?" The leader, dressed in a black cloak with red accents, holds up a paper. The masked man drawn on the paper looks painfully familiar, but Ranboo can't recall why.

"N-no, why?"

"Are you sure?" Another asks, adjusting his goggles.

"Yeah, pretty sure." Ranboo shuffles uncomfortably.

"Hm. Okay. Good, because he's a dangerous man. Stay away from him."

"I can handle myself." The defiance slips out before he can stop himself.

"Antfrost. George. I want a straight answer." The leader says. Ranboo takes a step back as goggles-dude and his other companion circle around him.

"Wait, I really don't know who that is!" He doesn't want to fight. He doesn't want to fight. He just wants to be left alone.

"Bad?" Goggles-dude asks the leader.

"You know what? Rough him up a bit anyway." The leader smiles. "We'd like to pass on a message, Ranboo."

"Wh-what's the message?" Ranboo's voice trembles as he turns frantically, trying in vain to keep an eye on all three of them at once as they surround him.

"Stay off our turf."

Panic anger overcomes Ranboo and his vision goes black.

He dodges their first attacks. Ducking and weaving between the stumbling assaillants, Ranboo slips a dagger from his sleeve and lashes out: tight, controlled slashes to scare them away. He doesn't want to fight. He jabs with his knuckles and pummels with the dagger's hilt. He doesn't want to fight, but they threatened him. They threatened Dream.

Ranboo huddles in his classroom, covered in blood, yet unharmed. "Great." He grumbles, upset that his only set of nice clothes has been ruined. How'd they get ruined??

"You good, mate?" Philza sips tea in the corner. Rain patters on the windows and thuds on the roof. Tonight is not a good night.

"I- I think so. What happened?"

"Three little bitches jumped you. I heard the screams and came to watch."

"You saved me? Thanks."

"Hm? No, mate, I did nothing. I said, I came to watch." Philza chuckles and sets down his tea. "You took care of them yourself. Last I saw, they were scrambling to get away from you."

"Oh. I ruined my clothes, dang."

"Your parents can get you new ones."

Ranboo stares at the ground. "Um. Hah. Yeah. I don't actually. Have. Parents. Or a home." He spits the last part out hastily, ears flushing with shame.

"Oh, damn." Philza hums. "You got anywhere to hole up away from the rain?"

"I- I have an alley." Ranboo mumbles.

"That won't do, mate. Techno, I'm kidnapping an orphan."

"K." Techno replies, his head plopped on his desk. Ranboo hadn't even noticed his presence.

"Uh. Is it technically kidnapping?"

Philza draws and cleans a bloody dagger. "Yes."

Chapter 5: Meet Me In The Gutter

Chapter Text

It's a hobby some would call obsessive or even creepy. Wilbur Soot doesn't care what anyone thinks, it's his world and everyone else is just living in it.

--Tommy needs encouragement. He's latched onto Philza as a fath- role model worryingly fast. Have I not been enough for him? He told me he wants to kill Technoblade, but I could see the lie in his eyes. He's too kind, and now he's being torn in two directions. Should I ease the strain? Or should I see how long it takes for him to break?--

Wilbur doesn't care what others think of him. His sly gaze flickers from person to person, lingering on the bright ray of sunshine that is Tommy.

--Tubbo worries me. He's been mostly silent ever since Technoblade showed up. Is he planning something?--

--Eret wants to kill Technoblade purely for the money. I saw the way their eyes lit up at the bounty. Which brings to mind another question. Why hasn't anyone outside of this class actually tried to kill Technoblade?--

--Ranboo never lets go of that notebook. I could swear it had a different cover. He's creepy. Avoid him.--

--Quackity has an intense grudge against Technoblade. But he's always with his gang, so I haven't been able to talk to him.--

--Hannah Rose started sparring with Foolish and Charlie last week. She's good. Too good. I don't trust her.--

--I can't get a read on Sapnap. He's always with Quackity, so I never have a chance to have a nice little chat, a good old tete-a-tete.--

--Connor wants to kill Technoblade. Boring.--

--Charlie hasn't shown any bent towards one side or another. He goes around with his saccharine "humour" and fails all his quizzes like he doesn't want Philza to train us. Maybe I should get him expelled.--

--Foolish says strange things. I don't like him.--

Wilbur pauses when he's finished silently dissing all his fellow students. The teachers are next.

--Ponk just sort of showed up one day and then stayed as the math teacher. His quizzes are so goddamn annoying. He hasn't shown any signs of wanting to kill Technoblade, though.--

--Punz was here for like a day, and then was sent to the hospital as the result of Techno's completely just and righteous defense of Philza. Unknown if he will find the guts to return or not.--

--Philza. Ah, Philza. Mere words can not convey the sheer respect I have for that man's dedication to chaos. Why, just the other day, I saw him feeding birds as they perched on him. He then used them for target practice. Magnificent. If we all endeavor to succeed in our classes, he will teach us how to kill his friend.--

--Technoblade is an enigma. Seriously. Does this mutant man ever sleep? By all accounts, he should be a terrible teacher, yet somehow he finds the time and tenacious willpower to teach all the subjects in a concise and understandable way. Not to mention his casual sprinkling of anarchy propaganda. I wish to know his secrets. I will torture them out of him if need be.--

"Whatcha writing?" Tommy inquires.

"Nothing!" Grinning innocently, Wilbur snaps his notebook closed.

"Is it about me? Are you writing how good I am at luv?"

"No, Tommy." Wilbur ruffles his friend's fluffy hair, ignoring Tommy's complaints. "I'm writing a diary. You can't read it."

"f*ck off, I'll write my own diary!"

Wilbur smiles and sits back, listening to Tommy rant. It would be interesting, wouldn't it, to see how he deals with the conundrum of looking up to Philza while being pressured to kill Technoblade. Wilbur can't wait to see him break.

Badboyhalo paces in the Duckling's treehouse, wincing with every step. Antfrost binds George's wounds. "This has gone too far, Bad!" George complains.

"Shut up! I know we can think of something!"

"Our reputation is on the line! If anybody looks even slightly deeper into our pasts, we're all screwed."

"Shut up!" Bad screeches. "We are Professional Assassins, that's all we ever have been, and nobody is going to question it unless you two screw up again!"

Antfrost glowers, tightening a bandage on George's arm. "You screwed up, too."

"How was I supposed to know?? He's a highschool student, a teenager, he shouldn't be good at fighting!!"

"He's better than us. You think Dream taught him?" George tries to scratch at his bandages, but Antfrost smacks his hand away.

"I don't know, you muffinheads, but we need to figure something out. Maybe take some martial arts classes."

"You want us to go back to school??"

"No! Yes?? Maybe? I don't know." Bad replies miserably. "We've gotta get outta here before Quackity and his gang show up."

"Too f*cking late." Quackity snarls behind Bad, dropping through the window. "Why the f*ck didn't your motherf*cking special weapons do a single goddamned thing??"

"Language," Bad mutters half-heartedly.

"Why the f*ck are you buffoons planning to take classes for fighting?? You said you were professionals!!"

"That is true, we are professionals. But we may have been a teensy bit misleading about our line of work."

Quackity's scowl darkens and he draws his revolver. "I want blood, Bad. I want your blood so motherf*cking badly right now. f*cking tell me the truth."

Bad raises his hands, heart in his throat. "Wait, wait! I- we're not actually assassins, okay? We're just, uhh, our business is in, uhh-"

Quackity co*cks the gun. His eyes show no hint of mercy.

"Wait-wait-wait-" Bad cries, trembling. "We're just con-men! It's our business! We go around, telling people we can take care of whatever their problem is, then we take the money and dip! Haha!"

"We bit off a bit more than we could chew when President Skeppy paid us to help you kill Technoblade." George sighs. "Go ahead and shoot Bad, he's our leader. It was all his idea."

"N-no!!" Bad screeches, glaring at George. "Don't shoot!! Please!"

"f*ck you." Quackity flicks open the casing and empties the bullets onto the table. "f*ck you and your motherf*cking lies. You don't even have a supplier, do you?"

"No, we stole the prototype weapons from HBomb's lab!"

"I'll forgive you on one condition." Quackity gives them a small, hard smile. "Break into the lab and get us actual weapons that'll actually f*cking work on Techno. Nothing explosive, just knives and guns."

"Deal." Antfrost says. "Do we still get a cut?"

"Ten percent, but that's only if you don't f*ck up again."

"Ten??" Bad cries, forgetting his former fear. "That's only one billion!!"

"That's about a billion times more than you f*cking deserve, so don't test me, assholes."

Bad clenches his fists. Quackity is just a kid. He's just one kid. Bad, Antfrost, and George could easily win.

But that's what they thought about Ranboo. Bad huffs. "Deal."

Creeping around in the forest is not exactly what Awesamdude expected his career to lead to. But here he is, laying down a perimeter, alone.

Not quite alone, however. The two kids stalking him could do with some more practice staying silent. He's already learned their names from their hissing whispers.

"Niki, Jack, you shouldn't be here." He straightens after planting another post in the ground.

A girl with violently pink hair drops down from a tree. A boy with clashing blue and red sunglasses hops up from behind a stump, brushing the leaves off himself. "How'd you know we were there?" Jack whines.

"You were hardly quiet."

"What're you doing?" Niki crosses her arms, scowling.

"Do you want to die?" Sam asks darkly. He's bluffing, of course. He wouldn't kill innocents.

"Can you kill people?" Jack asks, excited.

"I could, if I wanted to."

"Can you kill Technoblade??"

"No."

"Why isn't anyone else trying?"

"His location was a secret." Sam sighs. "It's not anymore, but I'm going to ensure nobody else interferes."

"How are kids expected to kill an immortal??" Niki cries. "Why is the bounty so high?? Why is he teaching school instead of rotting in a prison??"

"Curious, aren't you." Sam scratches his head. "Well, I suppose I can answer the first two. You're not expected to kill him, you're being used to keep him in line. And the bounty is so high because he wanted it that high."

Niki glares at Sam. Jack's expression is unreadable behind his sunglasses. "Why-"

"Shoo." Sam waves a hand at them. "Go home before I lose my patience."

The two converse for a moment in hushed whispers. Then, simultaneously, they cry, "Teach us to kill Technoblade!"

Sam suppresses a smile. "No."

"Why not??"

"Because I have a job to do, and that involves not interfering."

"Is President Skeppy stalling??" Niki snaps.

"I can't answer that." Sam raises his crossbow upon hearing cautious footsteps sneaking past in the shadows of the trees. Niki and Jack both leap back into cover, but Sam ignores them. "Show yourself, or I put an arrow through your ribs."

"Please don't." Another teen steps out, raising his hands. The hidden weapons on his person wouldn't be obvious to someone less experienced, but are painfully visible to Sam.

"What are you doing out here?"

"I don't know?" The teen replies plaintively. "I was just taking a walk."

"Hm." Sam lowers the crossbow slightly. He activates the sensors in his false eye with a blink, scanning the teen. The scan glitches and sends a flash of pain through his skull. "Agh!"

"Are you okay, sir?" The teen steps forward. Warning bells chime in the back of Sam's mind, danger, danger, but Sam ignores them. This is just a kid. He's harmless.

"I'm fine. You should go home."

"Oh." The boy lowers his hands and opens the book he was holding. For a moment, Sam's eye glitches again, and the boy's form distorts; scales crawl across the boy's arms, twelve wings fold like fractals- Sam winces at the twinge of pain and the hallucinations fade. "I have a home, now." The boy mutters, and then wanders off.

Sam sighs and continues his job of setting up a fence around the school building for class 3-E. Niki and Jack have scampered off already. He's alone again.

Chapter 6: Follow Me Home

Chapter Text

Exams are the worst part of school, but the end of the first term approaches fast. Tommy determines he will not fail. Philza has promised to teach them how to fight, and by the ever-loving stars, Tommy wants to show off his mad skillz.

He's so intent on getting fighting lessons that he's dragged his friends into group study sessions. Wilbur insists on leading said sessions, and somehow the schoolwork gets entwined with role-playing battles with fiercesome monsters.

"The answer is forty-two!! I pull out a bazooka and blast everything to smithereens!" Tubbo cackles. "Nothing shall stand in the way of world domination."

"Tubbo," Wilbur sighs for the fortieth time. "That would kill all of your teammates."

"Do I care?" Tubbo grins innocently. "Less competition, big man!"

"I lay down and die." Ranboo says drily, leaning against the wall with his arm around Tubbo's shoulders.

"Not you, Ranboo, you're going to be my puppet queen. Every world-dominating super-villain needs a puppet queen." Tubbo says, quite matter-of-fact.

Tommy scrawls messily on his workbook, determined to complete the next answer first and get a turn. "Ha! f*cking x equals twenty-nine!" He crows. "I shoot my nets at Tubbo and capture him!!"

"Stand-off." Wilbur says with a grin. "Who wrote Frankenstein?"

"Some woman with a boring name." Tommy retorts.

"Anne Rice!" Tubbo cries.

"Tommy, you got the closer answer. It was Mary Shelley."

"Alright, I win, and I say 'Hahaha, you f*cking imbecile, you are no match for me!' and then I drag them to jail."

"I completed my worksheet, Wilbur." Eret pipes up. Wilbur takes it, then nods for Eret to complete his bonus action. "I stab Tommy and release Tubbo, saying, 'The world is yours for the taking, but allow me to oversee a portion of it.' and then I kneel and plant my sword in the dust."

"Oh! Oh!" Tubbo waves his worksheet in the air. "Ranboo, stab him for me!"

"As you wish." Ranboo sighs with a wicked grin. Eret protests weakly in the background.

"Ranboo, you need to answer a question correctly, first." Wilbur steeples his fingers. "Or else there will be penalties."

"I, uh, I think I got this one correct." Ranboo shows his study sheet to Wilbur, who nods curtly.

"Fine, go ahead."

Ranboo turns to Eret and says in a dark tone, "You betrayed your friend. I can't trust you, Eret." Then he turns to Wilbur, "I run him through with my dagger."

"Eret, you're now a ghost." Wilbur shuffles through his game notes.

"Aw, man. Can I haunt anyone?"

"Yes."

"I haunt Ranboo to remind him of his crimes."

"Aw, dang, another voice." Ranboo groans playfully.

"Whaddya mean, another??" Tubbo cries. "Am I being replaced, Ranboo??"

"You- you are the voice." Ranboo laughs nervously. "Even when you're dead, I'll still hear you, shouting at me to not kill the bees."

"You better not. I worked hard to cultivate our apiary."

"I won't, I won't."

Tommy finishes his worksheet, ignoring the chatter of the others. "Ha!" He turns it into a paper plane and throws it to Wilbur. "I want twelve actions now!"

"Okay, Tommy." Wilbur replies with a sly smile. The others protest, but Tommy has Wilbur wrapped around his little finger, so they won't be winning this battle.

"But! I want to split them up between us, because I'm a f*cking nice person who loves women."

"Go ahead."

"My first action as King de facto of the world is to declare peace between the Moon and Mars."

"Wait, wait, you're king?? Eret, you didn't even kill him properly!!" Tubbo throws up his hands. "Ranboo, kill Tommy for me."

"Hypothetically, what if I didn't?"

"Ranboo. Are you betraying me??"

"No, no, I said hypothetically."

"Then, hypothetically, I would nuke your entire homeland and make you watch as I killed your family before your very eyes."

"Oh! Oh, no."

"And then I would torture you to death."

"Oh, man. That would not be good."

"So are you going to betray me?"

"Apparently not."

"Aw, man. I wanted to torture somebody." Tubbo sighs.

Ranboo gives Tommy a look that says 'help me'.

"You both lost your turns for talking too long." Wilbur decides. "Tommy and Eret, you both have an extra turn."

"I turn corporeal using necromancy, and I use Tubbo's soul as the energy source, draining him of life." Eret says, his cheerful eyes belying his dark tone.

"No! Ranboo, avenge meeeee!!" Tubbo cries melodramatically to the heavens.

"Oh no! I'll avenge you!!"

"I kill Ranboo." Tommy cackles at the horrified look on Ranboo's face.

"Oh, that's not good."

"How do you kill him, Tommy?" Wilbur asks.

"I stab the bastard through the f*cking eyes."

"Oh. Man. That sounds painful." Ranboo winces.

"It is. You're screaming like a f*cking bitch."

"Am I? Oh dang, that's not fun. Am I a ghost now?"

"Ghostboo." Tubbo laughs. "You're now Ghostboo."

"You're Toast, you don't get to mock my name."

Tommy frowns. "What's my ghost name?"

"Ghommy." Ranboo laughs. "Eret is Gheret."

"Tommy, you think we're ready for the exams?" Wilbur gathers the papers scattered across the floor.

"f*ck yeah, we are. We'll crush those bastards to dust. We'll get the highest grades of anybody in the entire school!"

"What do you mean, you can't transfer me?? My grades are the worst they've ever been in years!!" Jack cries, stomping his foot on the polished wood floor of the principal's office.

"I'm sorry, duckie, but I can't let anyone transfer between classes this year." Puffy-- rumored to be a pirate in a past life and therefore always called Captain-- frowns as she flicks through Jack's portfolio. "Why did you want to be transferred, anyway?"

"No reason." Jack grumbles, then stomps out of the office, slamming the door behind himself.

"How'd it go?" Niki hops down from one of the pillars.

"Terribly. Those bastards in 3-E must've told Captain Puffy to not let anyone in. They're probably planning to take over the world now, using Techno as bait!" Jack cries, his eyes burning with furious tears.

"That's awful!" Niki wails. "What will we do?"

"What do heroes do to villains? We bomb them."

"Bomb them?"

"I don't know how yet." Jack grins, filled with burning rage. "But we'll think of something."

"I know a man." Niki says decisively. "He'll get us supplies. If they really are planning to end the world, we need to stop them."

Exams roll around, and 3-E joins the the main school buildings for the tests. Quackity and Sapnap both leap on and hug Karl Jacobs. Tommy strides through the testing auditorium like he owns the place, with Wilbur glaring at everyone and Tubbo whetting his dagger with a placid smile.

Fundy watches the chaos from the sidelines, chewing on caramel taffy and bubblegum at the same time. He doesn't recognize the quiet boy huddled in a corner and writing. Before he can creep over and look at the boy's words, Eret accosts him. "Hey, man."

"Oh, hey!" Fundy grins and hugs his friend. "What've you been up to?"

"Oh, just trying to stop the world from ending and make a profit in the process, you know, the usual."

"Right, right. What's up with that, anyway? This guy, Technoblade? He must be really hard to kill if nobody's done it yet."

"We have till the year ends." Eret says gravely.

"Right. But why hasn't anybody, I don't know, tried to get in on the action?"

"The government is supposed to be keeping his location a secret." Eret adjusts his sunglasses.

"Weird." Fundy pops a bubble between his lips.

"Indeed. I know there must be a weakness. But I'm not sure what it is."

"Maybe it's something like technical immortality! Maybe he can only be killed if he lets it happen!" Fundy theorizes, chewing more intensely.

Eret grimaces. "Perhaps. Threatening his friend, Philza, directly is out of the question. But perhaps we can get the kill switch from the president."

"Woah, woah, back up!" Fundy laughs. "There's already a kill switch in his friend and the prezz hasn't thought to use that??"

"Well, he's a hostage, but- oh."

"Exactly!! If the prezz actually wanted him dead, all they'd have to do is threaten to kill this Philza dude if Techno doesn't let himself be killed!" Fundy blows another bubble and pops it with his teeth. "Damn, I'm good."

"That's assuming Technoblade would die if he allowed it. What if he can't?" Eret muses.

"He has to have some weakness. How was he even created??"

"I- I don't know."

"The only way a mutant like that could be created is through Human intervention, aka a laboratory and scientists!!" Fundy claps his hands together excitedly. "But why would scientists create a creature who can destroy the world?? Unless he can't, and this is all just a damn test."

"Hmm." Eret doesn't sound convinced.

"So, they're trying to develop immortality, and they're testing it on Technoblade-"

"Why him?" Eret asks. "And if it is a test, why here, with a bunch of students?"

"He got loose before the tests could be finalized, and they're trying to contain him again!" Fundy starts pacing. "He was a terrorist, yeah? I remember him in the news. The Acolyte."

"Blood for the blood god." Eret reminisces, paling. "That's right."

"He only ever went after important government figures! But, five years ago, he disappeared, and nobody ever heard from him again. Until now..." Fundy grins wildly. "This is amazing, I can't believe I get front row seats to a conspiracy!"

"Wait." Eret groans. "He had a partner."

"Oh! He did?"

"Technoblade was the Acolyte. But his partner was the Angel. What if that was-"

"Philza!!" Fundy cries. "Oh god, we have both of the most deadly international terrorists in my school!! Why couldn't I have worn better clothes??"

"I don't think that should be our main concern." Eret steeples his fingers. "I think we should worry more about what they're planning to do."

"I'm going to talk to Captain Puffy." Fundy decides. "Come with me?"

"I'll pass. Good luck."

"I've got the best luck in the world." Fundy crows and skips off. He glances back once, briefly, only to see Eret watching him with an unreadable expression.

Tipsy, Schlatt lounges on one of the pristine metal tables. In the background, HBomb sweeps up the shards of a broken whiskey bottle, the remnants of a drunken tantrum.

"Heyyy." Schlatt greets the mercenary waiting in the doorway. "Come on in."

"How much do I get paid for my trouble?" The mercenary asks, slouching in a too-large purple hoodie and baggy pants.

"Fifteen billion, take it or leave it." Schlatt grins.

"I'll take it. But this is the last time."

"Sure, honey."

"How'd you lose him again?"

"Bitch killed half my f*cking scientists." Schlatt shrugs genially, hiding his irritation. "But we've got a neutralizing agent, now." He tosses a capsule to the mercenary, who catches it and inspects it. "Inject that and he'll be as harmless as a two-ton hippo."

"That's hardly what I'd call harmless."

"Eh, semantics. He won't be immortal."

"Hmm." The mercenary pockets the neutralizer. "I'll do it. But you'd better pay me exactly what you promised, or he dies."

"C'mon, darling, what do you take me for? A scam artist?? Nah, that's not my f*cking style. Return him safe and sound, and everything will be just fine." Schlatt lights a cigar, takes a deep drag, then lets it all out in a slow plume. "Do as I say and nobody gets hurt."

Eret opens his buzzing phone and answers, "Hey."

"Crocodiles don't cry often." The familiar voice says coldly into his ear.

"Crocodile tears are worthless." Eret replies.

Purpled laughs on the other end. "What do you say, partner? Ready to make some dough?"

Eret grins, baring his teeth. "Always."

Chapter 7: Make The Devil Your Friend

Chapter Text

The floor trembles as a nearby generator turns on to power the flickering lights. The sterile brightness slices painfully through Ranboo's head. He winces and tries to cover his eyes, only to discover his wrists are bound behind his metal chair. Out of curiousity, he tries to move his feet. Also bound. The taste of dry cotton in his mouth warns of the muffled noises he produces when he tries to shout.

Lacking options, Ranboo takes in his surroundings. The tight, grimy walls and lack of windows hint that he could be in a bunker. For the moment, his mind is calmly blank, clear of panic, but that could change in an instant. Not this again. Ranboo shakes his head. His fingers reach and clench in thin air, desperate to cling to his book, feel the glittery cover, see the bright colors of the kittens dolphins.

Sounds of muffled outrage echo through the otherwise silent halls. Ranboo perks up, listening intently. He can't tell who else is in this predicament with him.

What happened? Blurry flashes of terror, of pain, of rage, boil just beneath the level of recollection. The dart in his neck, spitting poison into his veins, weakening his limbs-

He can't recall anything. Not even the terror as his friends scream for help, scream in anger, what are they angry for, why are they scared, why are you scared?

Ranboo clenches his eyes closed, trying to shut out the creeping panic and the soft voice.

You're scared because you hurt them.

Ranboo shakes his head frantically. No! No, he would never hurt anyone.

But you would. And you did. They're all here, now, because of your little display. Oh, you won't die. But does he need them?

Who's he?? Ranboo glares at the wall, unable to visualize the voice that sounds so very familiar.

"Aren't you an unusual find." The man slouches in the door, draped in an oversized purple hoodie. "Heh. Techno will want you back, won't he."

Ranboo scowls at the man as best he can with a sock in his mouth. Technoblade and Philza wouldn't care if he disappeared.

"You want to talk? Too bad. Maybe later. You don't get privileges after what you did to us."

The sock contains Ranboo's shouts and curses.

The man smiles grimly and turns, limping out. "Your friends are fine. For now. f*ck up and one of them dies."

Tears leak out of Ranboo's eyes, burning and blurring his vision. He hangs his head and trembles with small, miserable sobs. He can't even remember what he did to deserve this.

It's the weekend after exams. Summer vacation. And that means time to f*ck sh*t up. Philza has given out a schedule for the fighting classes, so he'll be preoccupied with that, but Technoblade has other plans.

Techno strides out of the building, narrowing his eyes at the camouflaged form of Awesamdude in the trees. The government security agent has been watching him for a while. Techno's not technically allowed out of Sam's perimeter around the building, but rules are for losers.

"Techno." Sam greets him as Techno strides past. "Where are you going?"

Techno wrinkles his nose, wishing he'd transformed into his chrysaor state earlier. Human form tends to be limiting, and the boar-like attributes, not to mention the multiple sets of wings, are useful for intimidation purposes. "Oh, nowhere in particular. I just thought I'd boost the economy of the nearby town with some of your president's money."

"Have you seen Tommy anywhere?"

"Mm, no. I'd assume he's on vacation."

"Interesting." Sam's expression is completely unreadable. The leaves behind him make a fascinating shape, almost like a dog. Techno stares at the waving greenery, failing to catch Sam's next words.

"What's that? The leaves distracted me."

"I said, I got a strange call from him, but now I can't find him anywhere."

"That's odd." Techno yawns. The kid is probably off gallivanting somewhere and laughing about pranking Sam. "Did you try Quackity's treehouse?"

"No- he has a treehouse? Where?"

"Forget I said anything." Technoblade waves a dismissive hand.

"Tell me, Techno." Sam growls.

Technoblade considers the effort of intimidating Sam, added to the potential backlash onto Philza, and decides it's totally worth it. "Oh, I'm keeping you safe. It's for your own good."

"Huh? Techno, what do you mean?"

"Quackity and the Ducklings will shoot first." Technoblade lets a slow smile crack across his face. He can see Quackity sneaking up behind Sam.

"They're teens, how aggressive can they be?"

"We sharpen the motherf*cking bones of our enemies and use them to slaughter every bastard who stands in our way." Quackity drops down from the tree, grinning wickedly. "Oh, and Tommy isn't at our place, either. I was just looking for him."

"Quackity." Techno greets the teen with equanimity.

"Techno." Quackity returns in the exact same tone.

"Uh, alright, I'm going to go see if Tubbo knows." Sam moves off awkwardly. "Techno, don't leave the perimeter. I will know."

"Will you, now." Techno returns in a slow drawl.

"I've got the kill switch, Techno. Don't push me." Sam scowls, then yelps as Quackity kicks him in the shin.

"f*cking don't ever threaten the old man again, you bastard."

"Don't let Phil hear you call him that." Techno reproaches with a grim smile.

"Alright, alright!" Sam cries, losing the battle for his dignity as Quackity manages to steal his cap and then proceeds to wear it. "Techno, go ahead, but if you hurt anyone in the town, there will be consequences."

"Who said anything about killing? There's no major governmental figures down there. They're safe from me."

Sam gives a pained sigh and then strides off to look for Tommy. Quackity flips Techno off, then trots to catch up with Sam, still wearing the agent's hat.

Techno heaves a relieved sigh at finally being alone and free to wander. Hidden in the seclusion of the trees, he stretches out his wings and breathes in the aromatic air. The thousands of souls murmuring in his veins hunger for blood. Not yet, though. Not quite yet.

Wilbur keeps his eyes closed, feigning sleep as he examines his situation. His feet are free, but his wrists are bound, and there's a gag tied around his mouth. He can hear Tommy beside him, raging through his own gag. Charlie whimpers on Tommy's other side.

Where's Eret and Ranboo?? What the hell happened?? Wilbur tries to think back.

<<~rewind~<<

Eret suggested building a treehouse like the Ducklings'. He said he knew a good place for it, so Wilbur and Tommy followed him. Charlie tagged along, cracking terrible jokes with Wilbur.

After passing the perimeter, which seemed to have been deactivated, Eret stopped at a huge tree. Ranboo showed up out of the blue, disoriented and asking Eret why he was there.

And then- and then- what happened?

Wings, so many wings, bird and bat and beetle and butterfly-

Ranboo transformed. There's no other way to say it. The quiet, creepy boy who had always sat at the back of the classroom went absolutely feral for no goddamn reason.

A man appeared, dropping from the trees, buried in an oversized hoodie. He was unfamiliar, but Eret fought by his side like they'd sparred together before. Ranboo, or whatever creature Ranboo had become, grew weaker and slower by the moment, lashing out at whatever was closest. Wilbur dragged Tommy away from the fight and tried to flee.

Charlie was wounded while trying to break up the fight and calm Ranboo down. Tommy screamed and tried to run back to save him. Wilbur had to follow, he couldn't let his idiot friend die on his own.

Eret stepped back as Ranboo finally fell unconscious to the ground. The mutant-- or angel-- looked almost adorable, lying there in a limp puddle of wings and eyes and claws. Tommy pulled bandages out of his backpack and started binding Charlie's wounds.

Wilbur remembers the next few moments vividly.

"Eret, f*cking help me!" Tommy snapped.

"No hard feelings, boys." Eret said.

A dart pricked Wilbur's arm. Tommy shrieked as he was darted as well. "You bastard, you f*ckin basss..." He didn't get to finish his words.

Unable to move, Wilbur soon followed Tommy into unconsciousness.

>>~present~>>

Remembering the events only leaves Wilbur with more questions. But one of them is about to be answered. The man in the hoodie stands over him, his heavy footsteps so unlike Eret's.

"I know you're awake, Wilbur."

Wilbur opens his eyes and shrugs eloquently.

"I want you to write a letter."

Wilbur makes an agreeable noise through the gag.

"Alright, I'll take the gag off. There's nobody near for miles, so screaming won't do anything besides piss me off."

"Who are you?" Wilbur asks as soon as the gag is off.

"Purpled." The man checks his wrists to make sure they're still tightly bound.

"What would you like me to write?" Wilbur attempts civility. There's no point in pissing off his captor yet.

"A ransom note." Purpled doesn't smile as he moves to check Tommy's wrists. Tommy attempts to headbutt him, but recieves a smack for his trouble.

"Don't f*cking touch Tommy, you son of a bitch." Wilbur snarls, anger sparking in his eyes.

"Alright." Purpled laughs, pissing Wilbur off further. "Eret, got a pencil and paper?"

"Yes, sir." Eret limps inside, one arm dangling, broken.

"I hope it hurts like hell." Wilbur glares at him, baring his teeth.

"Ha... I assure you, it hurts plenty." Eret gives a small, guilty laugh. "But you'll all be safe. We aren't going to hurt any of you. All we need is bait."

Purpled unties Wilbur's hands. "Be good."

"He just said none of us will be hurt." Wilbur retorts, stretching his sore fingers. "What're you going to do if I try to escape?"

"I'll kill Tommy." Purpled says darkly.

Wilbur shoots a venomous glare at Eret. "Hm??"

Eret puts the pencil and paper on a nearby table and moves to the door silently. Purpled answers for him, "We don't plan to hurt you if everyone behaves. But step a toe out of line, and someone will get hurt."

"What do you want me to write?" Wilbur decides to change the subject. He won't let Tommy be hurt, no matter what.

Technoblade returns to the school at night, practically inhaling pockies from the several boxes he acquired in the town. The townspeople had freaked out upon his arrival, but they'd been amenable to contributing food in return for his timely departure without harming anyone.

He enters the school building and flicks on the lights. Philza tilts his head up, raising the brim of his hat to peer at Techno with narrowed eyes. "You're back late."

"I got distracted." Read: there were fluffy dogs, and Techno gave all of them pats. "Want some pocky?"

"Sure, mate." Philza catches the box thrown to him, and snaps one of the chocolate-covered biscuits between his teeth. "I just got some troubling news, Techno. But I want you to stay out of this one. I have reason to think it's a trap."

Techno shrugs with a dry grin. "You really think I'd let myself be taken down by a trap? What's going on?"

"It's Purpled, mate."

"Oh." Technoblade clenches his claws into fists, his eyes darkening. "What makes you think I don't want revenge?"

"I know you do, Techno." Philza says apologetically. "But it ain't safe. He's gotta be working with Schlatt, you know that. If Schlatt is making a move, that means he's got something up his sleeve he thinks can take care of you." He chomps another pocky. "Look, I'll take care of this one."

Techno strides up to Philza and snatches him up by his coat. "I can't let you be captured, too." He growls. He can't let Philza be taken away, not again.

"I won't be. I'll get help." Philza smiles and presses his hand to Techno's bristly cheek. Techno pulls him into an embrace. "There, there, you big lug, I'll be fine."

"What happened?"

"Purpled kidnapped some of your students. Wilbur, Tommy, Charlie, and Ranboo. Eret helped him. I just got the ransom note."

Technoblade drops Philza with a gruff snort and turns away. "I'm coming with."

"No, you're not." Philza retorts. "It's a trap."

"How can you be sure it's not a trap for you, too?? I can't- I can't let them take you, Philza, I can't."

"If Schlatt wanted me, he'd have me. He's got President Skeppy in his pocket. You know that."

"Take Sam." Techno growls. "If you refuse to take me with you, at least take Sam."

"I already asked. He's not allowed to interfere."

"He will be held accountable if you're harmed."

"I'll be okay, mate."

"You better be, Philza. Or I don't know what I'll do." Technoblade gives a dry, ragged laugh. That's a lie. He knows exactly what he'll do.

Chapter 8: Close Your Eyes

Chapter Text

"Kids, you don't want to come with." Philza says in a low voice to the four teens trailing himself and Ponk.

"Yeah, you kids don't want to get hurt, do you?" Ponk agrees. Philza was reluctant enough to take the math teacher along, but he promised Techno he would bring somebody, and Ponk might be useful merely as a shield.

Tubbo emerges from a thicket. "I'm coming with." He smiles innocently. "I have bombs."

"We're coming too!" Hannah Rose jumps from behind a tree, dragging Foolish by the arm. "The bastards took Charlie!"

"Who else?" Philza sighs. There's one more person hidden in a bush.

"Oh, that's Fundy. He just sorta showed up and was stalking Technoblade, so we dragged him along before he could get punted." Tubbo says.

Fundy stands up and waves nervously. "Hi. You're the Angel, right? It's an honor to meet you."

"f*ck this." Philza covers his head in his hands and takes a deep breath. "Alright, fine, you're all coming. But you'd better listen to my every order, got it??"

"Yessir!" Fundy cries immediately. The others echo the sentiment.

"Alright, then, let's go." Philza laughs, dark and brittle. "Try and keep up."

He takes off into the trees, loping, picking up speed as he leaps over fallen trees and low bushes. Plasma arcs from the ports on his back, burning open his shirt. He leaps and mechanical wings billow, fire leaping from every plume.

Flying never ceases to amaze Philza. The wind caresses his face as he rises above the trees. He can't go higher than fifty meters above the ground, or the bomb in his chest will detonate. But even that isn't enough to extinguish the triumphant feeling of freedom.

He spots the location mentioned in the ransom note, and wheels around to check for hostiles. Nobody there, so he glides back to his small pack.

Fundy stares at him with stars in his eyes as Philza lands softly with several quick bats of his wings. "Wowowow!!" The teen squeals. "You can fly?? How'd you get those??"

"Yep." Philza smiles tightly. "Coords are this way. Let's go."

On the way, Rose and Foolish argue over the morality of eating a dead squirrel they found on the ground. Ponk finally snatches it, stuffing it in his knapsack to be cooked later. Fundy later steals it and drops it in a creek.

Tubbo remains silent, still with his sweet smile hiding whatever chaos is going on inside. Of all of them, Philza is most glad to have Tubbo here. He doesn't doubt that the kid actually brought bombs.

"Well, isn't this an interesting predicament." Dream's mask smiles down at Ranboo as his knife slips through the gag. His voice is thoughtful, badly hiding notes of condescension.

"Why don't you help us instead of gloating." Ranboo retorts.

"What's it look like I'm doing?"

"Gloating."

"I can put this back on." Dream warns; Ranboo knows he's bluffing, but he tenses anyway, dropping his eyes sullenly.

"Why are you here?"

"Well, you f*cked up and got yourself captured." Dream shrugs. "So here I am."

"What do you want with me?"

"Ranboo." Dream says, his voice hardening ever so slightly. "Smile."

"Wha-? No, why would I smile in a situation like this??" Ranboo snaps.

"Hmm. The poison messed with your conditioning. That's an easy fix, though."

"Conditioning??" Ranboo leaps to his feet, clenching his fists in Dream's green cowl. He slams the bastard into the wall, anger pulsing venom through his veins. "What the hell, man! I'm not conditioned. I'm not a dog!!" Pain unfurls like dozens of broken wings behind his back. He gasps with the sharp hurt, and lets Dream go, stumbling away.

"You were created for me, Ranboo." Dream says gently. Ranboo flinches and turns away. The broken metal chair and the frayed ropes lay scattered across the floor.

"N-no. No, I- I'm just a person, I'm just a normal person."

"No. You're not." Dream laughs. "Smile, Ranboo."

"Stop!!" Ranboo snarls, curling in on himself as his broken wings frantically beat and flutter. "It's not going to work!!"

"Oh, it will. Eventually. You're such a good boy. You always obey me eventually."

"Don't." Ranboo slams his claws against the wall, which cracks under the force. "Don't you dare treat me like a dog."

"What if- what if you are my dog?" Dream chuckles kindly. "I want you to beg. Beg, Ranboo. Or I let your friends die. You like them, right? Beg."

Ranboo growls and wishes he had his notebooks. "I am not your dog. Why can't you just be a decent human being and help us instead of trying to piss me off??"

"Ranboo-"

"No!" Ranboo snaps. "I'll save them myself! Just go."

Dream shrugs. "Alright. If you're sure you don't need my help..."

"I'm sure."

"Hm. Okay." Dream lifts his grappling gun and points it at the hole in the ceiling. "Get the neutralizing agent from Purpled and I'll forgive you this once."

"Wh-what agent?"

"It's a little dart, should be in his gun. Steal it for me."

"Fine. I will." Ranboo shoulders past Dream.

"And Ranboo?"

Ranboo stops just before the door, tensing. "What."

"Smile."

Tommy kicks Eret as the traitor tries to pull him up. Eret yelps, "Ow! Tommy, please, stay still."

"So you can kill Techno?? No f*cking way!" Tommy struggles furiously against the ropes.

"We're not going to kill anyone." Eret replies, exasperated.

"Then why the f*ck did you kidnap us??"

Purpled steps into the room, flipping a knife. "We're not going to kill your precious teacher. My client wants him alive."

"You wanna kidnap f*cking Technoblade?? You bastards, you'll never capture him!"

"I think they know what they're doing." Charlie laughs nervously. "They did capture us, Tommy, maybe you shouldn't antagonize them."

"I'll antagonize whoever the f*ck I want!!" Tommy yells, but goes still when Purpled approaches with the knife.

Wilbur leans against Tommy's shoulder. "Tommy, Tommy, take a deep breath. Calm yourself."

"You don't want Wilbur to get hurt, do you, Tommy?" Purpled pulls Wilbur to his feet and presses the knife to his shoulder.

"N-no!" Tommy cries. "Why would you- why? Why would you hurt him when I'm the one pissing you off??"

Eret takes the knife from Purpled. "Please. Let's just get this over with. Tommy, please stand up, or we'll have to leave you here."

"Fine, fine!" Tommy lets Eret pull him up to his feet. Charlie is next, whimpering from the poorly bandaged wounds.

"I'll get Ranboo." Purpled exits the room. Eret shuffles nervously under the baleful glares of all three hostages.

Tommy shoves past Eret to the door. "Well, are we f*cking going or not??"

Eret leads the captives outside the bunker, then stops in the forest to wait for Purpled and Ranboo. Tommy tests the ropes around his wrists again. They're too tight, close to cutting off the circulation.

"Purpled?" Eret calls back into the bunker.

But nobody comes.

If Philza catches Technoblade trailing him and his small group, the worst that could happen is he's given the silent treatment. Philza can never bear to do it for longer than an hour, though, even if he threatens a week. Techno stalks silently through the forest, hidden in the dappled shadows.

Watching Philza fly circles around the team of kids plus Ponk makes Techno's heart soar for his friend. He hasn't seen Phil flying for ages. Techno sneaks around the group as they stop in a glade; he prepares to flank any hostiles that might attempt to ambush them.

He spots Eret going towards the glade with Tommy, Wilbur, and Charlie all following, their wrists bound behind their backs. But where's Ranboo and Purpled?

Techno heads in the direction the hostages came from. Philza can handle Eret.

A bunker entrance, poorly hidden in a pile of sticks and leaves, glints in the sun rays. Techno ducks to get inside. He moves through the tight spaces slowly, ready for battle.

A torn and bloody body gasps raggedly on the floor, barely recognizable. "Heh?" Techno snorts in confusion. Who did this??

Purpled is almost dead. His hand grips a dart gun. "Y-you-" He gasps. "d-damn bastard-" He raises the gun and shoots.

Nothing happens. The mercenary falls unconscious.

"Rip." Techno mocks him, stepping over the body.

"Ah. Techno." Ranboo's voice floats through the silence. Techno twists his head to look behind him.

Ranboo crouches on the ceiling, his fangs bared in a smile, dozens of wings fluttering or limp-- rage sparks as Techno notices most of them are broken-- and eyes wide, staring from every limb, rarely blinking. Obsidian scales dance across his death-white skin.

"Philza is going to kill me." Techno laughs awkwardly, rubbing his bristled forehead and wrinkling his snout.

"Why?" Ranboo sounds honestly confused.

"Ah- well, he warned me to not follow him, but I did, and now you're here and all mutated, so I'm gonna have to bring you back once you transform. We don't want any questions, you know how it is. Kinda awkward having two mutants at the same school." Techno tries to make light of the situation, internally panicking.

How is he supposed to help Ranboo through this?? He's a terrible role model. Philza would know what to do. Philza is going to be so incredibly furious.

"Hmm." Ranboo hums, still staring at Techno. It's starting to get a bit creepy.

"Did you kill Purpled?" Techno blurts. "I'm not, I'm not mad or anything, just a useful thing to know in case authorities try to investigate." He laughs again, uneasy. Protect the child, protect, protect- the voices scream at him. "You know what, don't tell me. We'll just say I killed him."

"I killed him." Ranboo says, then drops to the floor, wobbling as though in a daze. "I killed him."

"Okay, okay, no flexing on me, now. I could've killed him if I wanted to."

Ranboo turns and walks out of the bunker. Techno follows him, confused.

Stopping in the forest, Ranboo tilts his head back and smiles down at Techno. "You're a good teacher."

"Uh. Not really relevant, but thanks?"

"I'm sorry." Ranboo collapses to his knees, gripping his head. "I'm sorry, I'm sorry-"

The millions of voices lash out at Techno for letting Ranboo cry. He panics and drops to his knees as well, gripping the teen's shoulders. "Hey, none of that. Pocky." He digs around in the pockets of his cape, pulling out boxes of pocky. "Eat."

Ranboo grips Techno's arm, right as he feels a hornet sting him there. Techno laughs. "Rip to that bug. Hornets aren't gonna be the thing that takes me down."

"Dang right." Ranboo mutters, staring at the ground. He nibbles weakly on a pocky. "I'm sorry."

Techno flings Ranboo over his shoulder and stands up. "Let's get you back to Philza."

Ranboo makes a faint noise of protest, which gets lost in the wind as Techno leaps into a sprint.

Philza crosses his arms, scowling at Eret. "Well? Untie them, kid."

"Purpled should be here any minute, please-" Eret pales as Philza raises his throwing knives.

"You want to do this the easy way, trust me."

"Your mate hasn't come yet. What if he's just bailed?" Ponk asks.

Philza will deal with Purpled later. Right now he has an errant kid to beat some sense into.

Eret raises his hands. "Alright, I admit, I may have made a mistake. But any of you would have taken the deal, too."

"No, we wouldn't have." Tubbo snarls, stepping forward. "You're in deep sh*t, big man." Eret drops his eyes, wilting in the face of Tubbo's wrath. "Look at me! Look into my eyes and see just how badly you f*cked up!"

"I'm sorry, Tubbo."

"No. No, you're not, you're just scared because your plan failed. But you will be sorry. Mark my words, big man, you will be so f*cking sorry. Now, untie them."

Eret does as ordered. He unties Tommy last. For good reason, too, as Tommy immediately knocks him into the dirt with a single punch.

"Eret, where's Ranboo?" Philza steps forward, postponing the anger of the teens for the moment.

"Purpled was supposed to bring him." Eret wipes the blood from his face, wincing.

"And where is Purpled?"

"Still in the bunker, probably."

"Alright. Ponk, make sure they don't maim him too badly."

Ponk nods. "You got it, man. You heard him, kids. No maiming or killing the traitor."

"That leaves us with plenty of leeway." Tubbo grins witheringly at Eret, who accepts his fate with a bowed head.

Philza turns to search for the bunker, but catches a flash of brown-red, the color of dried blood-- Techno's cape billowing as he sprints for Philza. "Damn fool." Philza tries to scowl, but can't help smiling fondly. Ranboo bounces on Techno's shoulder, having been thrown there haphazardly.

Techno comes to a halt before Philza, and drops Ranboo unceremoniously in a heap onto the ground. The teen looks none the worse for wear.

"Hey, mate." Philza helps Ranboo up. "This a fashion choice or a bad habit?" He gestures to the blood covering Ranboo's ripped clothes.

"Sorry." Ranboo mutters.

"No, don't be sorry, you're fine." Philza shoots a meaningful glare at Technoblade, just to let him know that there will be words later. "I'm just glad you're okay."

Technoblade grins placatingly. "I saved him, Philza."

Philza nods tersely. "So I see." He turns and starts back for the school. Technoblade and Ranboo trail after him.

Techno gasps and grips his arm. "Heh?? Damn hornet-" He growls.

"Techno?" Philza rushes to check the sting. Dark veins surround the pinprick, which leaks black fluid. "f*ck, Techno, did you get hit by a dart??"

"N-no- I don't think so?" Techno grips his head. "Phil- Phil, no, I think I did. Phil, get away from me-"

"Techno??"

Techno collapses limply, shifting back to his smaller, Human form.

In the taut silence left behind, Ranboo lets out a miserable laugh.

Chapter 9: Have A Little Faith In Me

Chapter Text

Quackity scowls blearily at the returning heroes. He and the other Ducklings were up the whole damn night trying to work out infiltration plans after Bad gave them the location of the laboratory and then peaced out with his team of scammers. Bad won't be returning again, but thanks to him, the Ducklings missed the whole rescue mission.

It's summer vacation, so everyone ought to be home anyway, but Philza promised to teach them fighting, and by the goddamned stars, Quackity is determined to make the old man follow through.

Philza steps tiredly into the classroom. His bloodshot, baggy eyes go wide in surprise as he sees all the students gathered there. Quackity salutes him with a smirk. Ranboo hides in the shadows of the door, watching Phil with worried sulkiness.

"Kids, I need a favor." Philza collapses into a chair, hiding his face. "I know you want him dead. But- please. Wait a bit." He hesitates and then continues in a ragged voice, "Purpled hit him with a neutralizing agent. He- he can die, again. But I- I'm begging you all, please don't tell anyone or try to kill him until our time is up."

"Why should we??" Quackity demands, realizing immediately with a confusing mixture of delight and horror that Technoblade has been rendered vulnerable. Does this mean their plan to sneak into the lab is pointless now?

"I don't know." Philza hiccups. He's crying. The tears burn a hole through Quackity's delight. "I don't know, dammit. Please, just wait to kill him at the end of the year. No, better, kill both of us then, I've done the same terrible things as he has! I should be punished too, goddammit, why is he the one to suffer for both our crimes??"

"I'll wait." Quackity leans back. "I'll f*cking wait till time's up, but that doesn't mean I'm giving up my revenge."

"I'll wait too!" Tommy cries. "I'm the f*cking king of procrastination!"

Sapnap and the Ducklings follow Quackity's example. The others follow Tommy's example. Together, the class proclaims their willingness to postpone Techno's death.

Philza rubs his eyes and takes the handkerchief Tommy stole from Wilbur to offer him. "Thank you, kids."

"We still get fighting lessons, right?" Quackity asks with a scowl.

"Yes, of course you do. You've all earned them." Philza smiles tremulously. "Ranboo, Techno, you can come out."

Ranboo steps into the light, blatantly normal-seeming, so unlike the nightmare Tommy and Charlie described. He hovers beside Technoblade as the former terrorist limps through the room to reach his desk. He seems so small and frail without the mutation-induced strength. He looks so weak. Quackity could put a bullet through his head right now and he wouldn't be able to dodge or absorb it.

But Quackity sees Philza watching Techno with worried, fond eyes. He thinks of Sapnap. Of Techno eating the goddamn grenade to save Sapnap.

Quackity decides he can wait. If he kills Technoblade right away, after all, Philza won't give anybody fighting lessons.

And if Philza doesn't give them fighting lessons, then who the f*ck is going to wreak vengeance on whatever motherf*cking scientists created the mutants?

Niki and Jack watch through binoculars as their enemies spar with each other in the clearing outside the remote school building designated for Class 3-E. "Dang." Jack says. "They're not bad."

"They can't fight a bomb." Niki grins.

"Much less ten." Jack matches Niki's toothy smile.

"Did you get the supplies?"

"Yes, ma'am."

"Good work, Jack." Niki drops lightly from the tree. "We can proceed with the operation Smithereens in a week."

"Awesome." Jack chuckles darkly. "Do we really want to give them that much time, though?"

"We need to get them acclimated to the bait, first." Niki taps her fingers to her lips. "This will go wonderfully, Jack, don't worry. That loser class won't be a threat much longer."

"Sir, Purpled is dead." HBomb reports, wincing nervously in apprehension.

"The f*ck he is, I told that bitch to get me Technoblade, and by god, he'd better do it!" Schlatt tips a whiskey bottle into his mouth, gulping the burning liquid down. He lowers it and peers at HBomb. "Unless somebody f*cked up again."

"He must have, sir." HBomb grasps the lifeline eagerly. "The neutralizing agent was nowhere near his body."

"What?" Schlatt says calmly, his tone barely warning of the torrent of rage he's about to unleash upon the poor unwitting HBomb. "Where the f*ck is it, then?"

"Our clean-up team found the crushed casing nearby!" HBomb continues to dig his grave. "So-"

"So he found it, and destroyed it." Schlatt snarls.

HBomb nods quickly. "Y-yes, but-"

"Do you know how long it took to make enough neutralizer for one dart??"

"Months, sir, but-"

"And you're telling me Purpled f*cked up badly enough that somehow that goddamn mutant knew about the dart and destroyed it."

"Well- see, we have reason to believe Dream is involved!"

"Damn it!" Schlatt bellows and smashes the whiskey bottle on the table. His hand starts to bleed and sting from the shards. "HBomb." He growls, trying to pretend he's still in control; he needs to still be in control. "Why the f*ck is that motherf*cking spider involved?? I gave him a mutant already, why the hell does he want to steal mine??"

"I thought you'd want his help!" HBomb squeals. "So I let him know we're trying to hunt Technoblade down!"

"f*ck this, f*ck you, you motherf*cking imbecile, you complete and utter moron, why the f*ck WOULD YOU BETRAY ME LIKE THIS??" Schlatt roars.

HBomb cowers, hiding ineffectively behind his broom. "I- I'm sorry, sir, but I thought-"

"Well, there's the f*cking problem, yeah, bitch?? You thought. I do the thinking here." Schlatt reaches for his gun. "You want to know what I'm thinking, HBomb? Do you want to know what I'm thinking of, right f*cking now??"

"Pl-please-" HBomb whimpers, staring into the barrel as it aims between his eyes.

"I'm thinking you're f*cking useless to me, HBomb. And you know what happens to useless whiny bitches like you, right?"

"Please don't kill me!" HBomb sobs.

"Ahh, whatever." Schlatt lowers the gun, too furious to admit he can't bring himself to actually pull the trigger and become a murderer. "Leave my sight and don't f*cking show your ugly mug for a week."

HBomb scurries away, leaving Schlatt to bind his bloody hand, alone in the sterile laboratory.

Getting beaten up would have been bearable. Being bullied mercilessly would have been completely deserved. But being completely and utterly ignored for days on end breaks Eret like a goddamn crusher.

The more he thinks back on her actions, the guiltier she feels. During the sparring classes, they copy Philza's moves alone, behind everyone else working with partners. When the class decides to camp in the forest for the rest of summer vacation, Eret sets up his tent several meters away from the rest. She stands back and watches their former friends banter and laugh as they raise their own tents.

"Hey."

Eret almost jumps at the low voice of Ranboo addressing her. Turning, he faces the mutant, clenching her hands to hide the trembling. "Yeah?"

Ranboo steps up next to them, gazing into the smoking campfire amidst the scattered tents. "Why are you scared of me?"

"You- you already know why." Eret stares at his hands. Out, out, damned spot.

"Um. I don't really remember, but yeah, okay." Ranboo sighs. "I- I don't think I'm sorry."

"Neither am I, apparently." Bitterly laughing, Eret grips her chest as the sharp pain of grief blossoms.

"I think you are."

"What do you know??" Eret lashes out, shoving Ranboo. "If everything had gone according to plan, it would all be fine!"

"But you still wouldn't have any friends." Ranboo replies calmly.

It hurts that he's right. Eret knows he's right. They turn away, hunched and close to tears. "Why am I scared of you?" She mutters in a low, desperate voice. "Because I know. I saw what you are. I know you- you killed Purpled."

Ranboo frowns. "Techno killed him." He says it so casually. Techno. As though the bastard wasn't a mass-murderer and terrorist, bestowing violence in the name of anarchy and blood. "What do you think I am?"

"A monster." Eret snaps, rounding on Ranboo, who backpedals with surprised fear in his eyes. "You're a monster. You might not remember. Your friends might pretend to forget. But I know."

Ranboo gathers his composure and stands his ground, forcing Eret back a step. "If I'm a monster, and I protected my friends... what does that make you?" He turns on his heel and storms away into the trees.

Shattered and lost, Eret can only watch him disappear.

Karl slips a briefcase under the table to his contact, who takes it and gives it a little shake. His contact then slides a folder over the table. Karl snatches it and stuffs it in his backpack. The two remain in silence for a moment longer. Karl leaves first.

Once out of the main school's cafe, he runs all the way through the woods to the Ducklings' treehouse. Echoing footsteps crack twigs behind him as he reaches the gang's base.

"Hey, what's that?" Fundy doesn't even bother trying to hide anymore as Karl climbs into the treehouse.

Karl pulls the ladder up. "None of your business."

"C'mon, we're in the same class!"

"You're not a Duckling."

"I can help!! Pleassse?" Fundy begs.

"Who the f*ck is bugging you, Karl??" Quackity sticks his head out the window. "Fundy?? Get the hell outta here."

"That was HBomb you were talking to!" Fundy cries desperately. Karl groans and hides his face in his hoodie. "I know that guy! I used to work for him!"

"Where?" Quackity asks.

"Some laboratory in the capital!" Fundy cries. "I was shadowing him for a potential internship!"

"Let the ladder down." Quackity orders. Karl sighs as he obeys.

"Fine, but I don't trust you."

"You don't have to." Fundy gives a smug smile as he leaps up the ladder.

Karl enters the treehouse and sets the blueprints down on the table. Sapnap and Foolish stop painting Connor's hair and gather around with Quackity and Fundy.

The laboratory blueprints spread across the table, promising revenge. Karl looks up and sees the hungry fire in Quackity's eyes. He looks to the side and meets the molten steel in Sapnap's gaze.

Quackity draws his dagger and sets the point on the blueprints. "Whoever the f*ck's been experimenting on people, let's f*cking find them and end their pathetic lives."

Technoblade slashes the saplings with a rapier, taking out his frustrated fury on the innocent young trees, ignoring the twinges of pain. He shouldn't be this weak.

Even before Schlatt started experimenting on him, he was stronger than this. He was powerful. The best fighter, the best tactician, the best at strategy. Now his body is frail and hurts merely to move.

He tries to snarl, but his breath catches in his throat, fear slithering roots into his chest. Irrational. He's being irrational. Technoblade isn't afraid of anything.

Except perhaps the pale blue of scrubs, the glint of scalpels, the searing agony- No! Technoblade scowls and tries to shove the flashes of terror and hunger and bitter, helpless rage away.

Philza approaches him with a cup of tea. Technoblade flinches away, unable to look at the man he failed, the friend he abandoned. "Techno?" Philza sets the tea down on a fallen tree and presses a hand to Technoblade's shoulder.

"Who am I, Phil?" Technoblade begs. Weak. The old Technoblade would never beg, would never cry.

"You're my friend." Philza answers.

"Why aren't I dead?"

"The kids agreed to keep it a secret and wait until the year is up."

"Phil. It's not going to last forever, Phil, you need to kill me soon. I can feel the damn resonancy in my chest. I don't know how long you have, but you need to kill me before I destroy the world."

"Techno." Philza's voice shakes. "No. Techno, we'll find something."

"Find what?? It hurts, Phil. It hurts to move, it hurts to talk... I've killed so many people, Phil, I deserve this, I deserve to die! Kill me, please. The kids are too innocent. They don't need to be turned into murderers like me." He thinks of Quackity, the blazing fire. He thinks of Ranboo, the gentle nightmare. Of Tommy, the merciless sunshine. Each and every student. They deserve better.

"Technoblade." Philza grips Techno's chin and brushes back his hair. "I deserve death as much as you. But I'm going to keep living. There's still people we need to kill, Techno, there's still governments to dismantle! We can't end now! We'll find a cure. A real cure. I promise."

"I don't want you to die."

"Ditto, mate." Philza embraces Techno gently. Techno wraps his arms around his friend, afraid to let go.

Chapter 10: Chase A Couple Hearts

Chapter Text

"We do it today, or not at all." Sapnap declares, slamming his dagger into the table.

"f*ck yeah, baby, let's murderify some motherf*cking bitches!!" Quackity cackles. His gang-- Connor, Foolish, Karl, Sapnap, and now Fundy-- rallies behind him as he flings himself out of the treehouse, landing with an easy roll on the ground.

Sapnap leaps from the treehouse and tumbles, bouncing onto his feet. The others take the ladder. "We need a car. Anybody have access to a car?"

"I do!" Fundy volunteers.

"Perfect."

Three hours later, the gang clings desperately to life as Fundy speeds down the highway to the capital in Captain Puffy's bus. His lane changes could strike the fear of god into God themself.

The big city is somehow even worse. Fundy uses the horn liberally at any given opportunity. He veers from street to street, goes the wrong way up one-way streets, and slams on the brake right before every stop sign. Quackity clings to his seat, nauseaus and wishing the damn bus had seatbelts or at the very least an eject driver button.

Fundy finally parks in a no parking zone, helpfully positioned right beside a construction zone, and everyone stumbles wearily from the death trap. After hurling his breakfast into a trashcan, Quackity decides the trip is off to a relatively good start.

The teens head into the alleyways, using their phones' maps to track down the laboratory. They've all got guns and daggers, and Sapnap borrowed some grenades and cherry bombs from Tubbo before the operation.

The main entrance to the lab is guarded by several security personnel. Sapnap primes and then rolls a smoke grenade towards them, and then the teens sneak into the lab through a secret entrance as the guards are distracted by the dark plumes from the grenade.

"Made it!" Quackity hushes his triumphant laugh. "Alright, Sapnap, Connor, Foolish, find a hostage. Fundy and Karl, you're with me."

"Yes, sir!" The gang hisses in unison, then muffles giggles in their hands.

Quackity leads his team through back rooms and unused hallways till he reaches the main floor. He rolls a smoke grenade into a bathroom and then hides. The fire alarm goes off, clanging.

When the floor is empty of personnel, Quackity, Fundy, and Karl sneak into the main labs.

"Woah." Karl gasps, awed even as Quackity gags in disgust. The human-not-human pieces lay scattered about on sterile tables. Quackity stares at the several pairs of massive wings attached to what's either a large dog or a small polar bear. The dog nuzzles the glass of their cage, chuffing softly. Wires and pipes hang limply detached.

"f*ck." Quackity breathes deep and nearly chokes on the terrible chemical smells. "f*ck, f*ck, f*ck. What the hell??"

"No, no, this is great, we found what we needed!!" Fundy cackles gleefully. "Now we know it was all a cover up by the lab!"

"I don't f*cking care about that!" Quackity snarls. "This is inhumane!! This is- it's awful!" He approaches the dog, drawn closer by rage and empathy. The password to the keypad was left on a sticky note on the glass. Quackity's fingers shake as he types it in.

The cage whooshes open. "Got some food?" Quackity calls to Karl.

Karl tosses a bag of lumpy hot dogs over, and Quackity offers them to the dog.

The dog sniffs at the meat and then laps it all up with a huge tongue. They chorf and nuzzle Quackity's shoulder. "I think he likes me." Quackity plays with the dog's round ears.

"We gotta get what we came for!!" Karl hisses. "We can't sneak a dog back to school, much less a f*cking six-winged monstrosity like that!"

"I bet Techno and Philza wouldn't mind." Quackity turns to the other cages, each filled with an engineered mutant. "I'm releasing all of them."

"Are you crazy??"

"Maybe!" Quackity snaps back, eyes burning.

"Found something." Fundy hisses. "Kinda important, too, so come here!"

Quackity reluctantly leaves the caged animals behind and goes to look at the screens Fundy pulled up on an array of monitors. "Wow, what the f*ck??"

"Damn it!" Fundy curses. "I was sure the exploding and destroying the world thing was fake news!! But if it's so dangerous, then why'd the scientists make more mutants??"

"Because, young Fundy." A hard, cold voice echoes through the lab. The dog growls. Quackity turns around and sees a large man holding a gun to Sapnap's head, with two security guards holding Foolish and Connor. "Money listens to nobody."

"The f*ck have you done??" Quackity snarls, stepping forward. The dog blocks his path, guarding him and growling at the cruel scientist.

"Oh, don't worry about the world. If I get my mutant back, then all will be well, peace and goodwill and so forth. You see, the explodey thing was a safeguard that went awry. But I have the fix for it."

"You'll never get your hands on Technoblade." Quackity growls.

"Won't I? Because, Quackity, you seem to have provided me with six hostages." The man grins and waves a bottle with the hand not currently threatening Sapnap with a gun. "And if he doesn't come back, then I can just start over with all of you!!"

"But the world will end!" Fundy cries.

"Oh, we'll get our hands on our dear old Technoblade eventually."

"Who are you?" Quackity clenches his fists.

"Schlatt." The man replies with a wide smile. "Why do you care, kid?"

"I've got a hit list. Now I have a name for the monster who created my nightmare."

"Oh, you think it's my fault Technoblade killed people?? Ha, f*ck, kid, you're funny. No. We captured him after his glory days were over. Never got my hands on the damn Angel, though."

"That wasn't what I f*cking meant, Schlatt." Quackity steps forward again. "You did this. All of this. It's inhumane, and you deserve to burn in hell for thousands of years for your crimes!"

"Haha, it wasn't just me, kiddo." Schlatt laughs, pissing Quackity off further. "You think I did this alone? I have scientists, guards, even maids working for me with full knowledge of what I do. You think some scrappy kid like you is gonna ruin it all for me??"

"Maybe he won't!" Another voice comes from the door. "But I can and I will! Eat lead, Schlatt!!"

Quackity yells and drags the dog down behind a table as gunfire goes off, deafening in the enclosed spaces. Sapnap was right there. Connor and Foolish, too.

"HBomb, this is the last time, I swear to f*cking god himself." Schlatt hisses, sounding pained. Quackity sees Karl vanish through a back door. Fundy starts to follow. "Hey! No moving!" Schlatt barks and Fundy freezes obediently.

One more gunshot goes off, leaving painful silence behind. Quackity forces himself to get up slowly. He has to make sure his gang is okay.

Sapnap, Connor, and Foolish are all unharmed. So is Fundy. Karl escaped. The bloody body limp on the floor on the ground isn't one Quackity recognizes, but Fundy looks grief-stricken, so it must be HBomb's.

"Alright, kids, into the cages. Wasn't there six of you??"

"No." Quackity lies, glaring at Schlatt.

"Only five, huh? Alright. Get in. Heh, you can keep the damn bear, too."

The teens huddle in the corners of their cages. Connor and Foolish have one, Fundy and Sapnap have another, and Quackity shares a cage with the bear. He pets the bear's fur as angry, helpless tears leak down his cheeks.

"What's his name?" Sapnap hisses to Quackity.

"What??"

"The bear. What's his name?"

"Steve, I guess." Quackity retorts with an aching laugh.

"That's a terrible name for a bear."

"Shut the f*ck up, is not."

"Is too."

"I'll get us all out of here, Sapnap. I f*cking promise you that." Quackity adds on to the promise in his heart. He'll f*cking kill Schlatt himself.

Tubbo and Ranboo didn't mean to uncover bombs hidden all over the school building. They just sorta stumbled across the explosive devices while Tubbo was showing off his metal detector. But now, Ranboo and Tubbo prance through the empty classes, piling their loot high in garbage bags.

"We can cause so much destruction!!" Tubbo sings with glee.

"We are going to get in so much trouble if anybody sees us." Ranboo frets.

"Don't worry so much, big guy!" Tubbo pounces on another bomb and tosses it in with the other ones as Ranboo yelps. "It'll be fine. Oh! You know what I wanna do with them?"

"What? Please don't say blow up the school, or I will divorce you again."

"No, you won't." Tubbo hums cheerfully. "But I wanna use them to mess with Sam!! We should plant them around his perimeter thingy and see when they go off!"

"Oh. I like that idea, actually." Ranboo nods his head vigorously. Tubbo nods back. For a whole two minutes, the conversation is nothing but mutual nodding.

"Right, big man, let's go! I think we've found all of them."

"Oh, okay." Ranboo follows Tubbo out into the woods. "Won't Sam be upset, though?"

"Yeah, but he'll get over it." Tubbo shrugs.

When they reach the perimeter, Ranboo hands bombs to Tubbo, who plants them by each post. When he runs out, he decides to get some of his own homemade bombs, so the two friends race back to the school.

Sam stands in the doorway, looking stern, as per usual. Tubbo rolls his eyes. "Sam, could you move? I need to get my bombs."

"And what are you doing with bombs, Tubbo?" Sam asks, scowling.

"We're playing a prank on you, big man, so scooch."

"Bombs are not a safe prank!" Sam cries. "How many times do I have to stop you from nearly blowing stuff up, Tubbo?? And you, Ranboo, I thought you were better than this??"

Ranboo wilts under the stern man's glare. Tubbo pats Ranboo's arm. "We are professionals, Sam. And you only stopped me five out of the, uhh, twenty-six times I've actually blown stuff up."

"Tubbo!" Sam cries, gripping his forehead. "Why??"

"Because it's fun." Tubbo shrugs. He likes explosions.

"Alright, come on. I can't believe you two tried to put bombs in the school, for crying out loud!"

"Oh, that wasn't us." Ranboo protests.

"How could it not be you?? You literally just confessed to putting bombs by my perimeter??"

"We found them in the school, big man. How'd you think we got so many? They're not even well-made, SMH."

"SMH." Ranboo echoes. "Rip to them. Our bombs now."

Sam groans loudly. "You seriously think I'm going to believe you? Alright, you're going back to the perimeter and defusing every single bomb you placed."

"But I didn't make them!" Tubbo protests. "They could explode!"

"Don't lie to me, Tubbo." Sam glowers.

Tubbo scowls back. "I'll tell Philza you're making us do dangerous work."

"Go ahead!" Sam cries. "He'll probably side with me!"

Tubbo thinks for a moment and realizes that Sam makes a fair point. "Alright, what if we find the real culprits?"

"You are the real culprits!!" Sam nearly screeches.

"Hey, man, what's going on?" Ponk comes up behind Sam. "Only me and Philza get to yell at the kids."

"Ponk, they placed bombs all over the school and by my perimeter!" Sam complains, clenching his fists in Ponk's hoodie.

"You think we could make him cry, big man?" Tubbo whispers to Ranboo.

"No, that's mean." Ranboo hisses back.

"True, true. But we could do it, right?"

"Mm, yeah, we could probably make him cry if we wanted to, but the question is, should we?"

"We should, we should."

"Okay, okay."

"Sam!" Tubbo interrupts Sam's skewed retelling of events. "We planted all the bombs. And! We are going to set them off in ten."

"Ten what??" Sam cries. "Tubbo, I told you to defuse them!!"

"Nine." Ranboo says.

"Ranboo, not you too, please, just defuse the bombs!"

"Eight." Tubbo grins. This is too much fun.

A heavy hand lands on Tubbo's shoulder. "What's this about bombs, mate?" Philza asks coldly. Ranboo yelps in surprise, wilting as Technoblade scowls at him behind Philza.

"N-nothing," Ranboo cries, the absolute traitor. "The bombs weren't even ours, we just found them!"

"Whose are they, then?"

"I don't- I don't know." Ranboo mumbles, drooping.

Tubbo crosses his arms. "I don't appreciate you using such a tone with my associate here." He says, matching Philza for coldness.

"Defuse them." Philza orders and storms past Sam and Ponk into the school building. "Sam, make sure they do."

"But- explosions-?" Tubbo cries, heartbroken.

"Rip." Technoblade chuckles as he follows Philza.

Sam groans. "How did I get stuck with babysitting duty??"

"I'll help you, man." Ponk volunteers. Tubbo shares a disgusted look with Ranboo. The two adults will be doing nothing but awkwardly flirting the entire time.

"Serves us right for trying to have fun." Ranboo mutters bitterly.

Tubbo bumps his shoulder. "Whaddya say we accidentally set off some cherry bombs to liven it up?"

Ranboo laughs teasingly. "I knew there was a reason to keep you around."

Captain Puffy storms to the Class 3-E school building. She slams open the door, practically snorting fire from her nostrils. "Where is Fundy??" She cries.

Philza and Technoblade look up from their tea and biscuits. "Heh?"

"That little ragamuffin stole the keys to my bus, and now the whole bus is gone!!" Puffy cries. "He doesn't even have a license!!"

"F." Philza replies with a small smile.

"This is not funny!!"

"It kinda is." Technoblade helpfully points out.

"I suspect your kids put him up to it." Puffy cuts to the chase. "I saw Tommy and his gang sparring outside with- wait, are those real swords??" She cries, distraught, staring out the window as the laughing kids try to stab each other.

"They're fine. They all know how to dodge."

"So you're not denying that those are real swords." Puffy laughs hysterically. "Why the hell are you both teachers??"

"Ask President Skeppy. Or better, don't, let us ask him for you before we kill him." Philza smiles.

"At least Ranboo and Tubbo are fine, I saw them exploring the woods with Sam." Puffy sighs. Philza and Technoblade give each other a look. Puffy groans, losing her mind. "What??"

"They're currently defusing bombs by the perimeter." Philza chuckles at Puffy's pain.

"Why?? That's so dangerous!!"

"Nah, they're fine. Tubbo knows what he's doing, he's blown up enough things."

"Tubbo- Tubbo blows things up??" Puffy collapses into a chair. "What? Why?"

"Because it's fun, I assume."

"This is your fault." She weakly tries to accuse Philza. "You're a bad influence."

"Fair enough. Why did you come here, again?"

"Oh. Right, Fundy!!" Puffy leaps to her feet. "Where's Quackity and his gang??"

"Probably at their tree house chilling."

Karl stumbles through the streets, sobbing and avoiding every person he sees, terrified to be sent back. He hides in an alley, trembling. He can't find the bus. Even if he could, how is he supposed to drive it all the way back? He's barely ever driven.

Vaguely familiar voices filter through the grimy alley. "We'll take care of it, don't worry, haha!"

"Bad?" Karl mutters, standing up nervously.

The three scam artists called Hunters turn and stare at Karl. The other man is weirdly out of place in the trash-filled alleyway, as he's dressed in a pristine suit. And he looks like the President.

"Bad!!" Karl ignores President Skeppy and runs into Badboyhalo's arms, bawling. "They captured everyone!!"

"Wait, you kids actually tried to infiltrate the lab??" Bad cries, sounding horrified. "We were going to do that, I swear, we just got a bit- preoccupied." He glances nervously at Skeppy.

"Please, Bad, George, Ant, I need your hunting skills!" Karl sobs. "Save my friends!"

The three scam artists-turned-Hunters glance at each other. "Yeah. Alright. We'll do that."

"Why don't we get Technoblade and Philza, too?" Antfrost suggests.

"Yeah! That's a great idea!" Bad cries. "Skeppy, we'll talk to you later, kay?"

"I'm coming with!" Skeppy cries. "This is the most excitement I've had in years."

Antfrost picks Karl up, and the team hurries to their van. "Hang on, guys." Karl murmurs, staring back at the capital as the van zooms down the highway for Erinome Highschool. "We're coming."

Chapter 11: Everything To Lose

Chapter Text

Puffy is about to explode from frustration as she starts back for the main school grounds. A van careens up the path through the woods, flying by and nearly knocking her down. She glares at it, shouting, "Rude!!"

Karl's face peers out at her from the window. President Skeppy gives her a jaunty wave from the passenger seat.

"What the hell is going on??" Puffy screeches and storms after them.

The car slows and stops for her. A door opens. She grumpily gets inside. "Who are you people??" She demands of the three unfamiliar men.

"I'm Bad, this is George and Antfrost. We're professional assassins." Bad introduces, his dark eyes gleaming with amusem*nt.

"Bad, you said it was supposed to be secret!" Skeppy cries.

"She's the principal, she can know." Bad grins at Puffy. "You wouldn't tell anyone, would you?"

"Uh. Sure. Karl, what the f*ck are you doing with these people??" She addresses her student.

Bad cries, "Language!"

"Sorry, frick. What the frick are you doing??"

"Ugh, I'll let it slide." Bad groans.

"I'm not talking to you, Bad!" Puffy grips her head, feeling a headache start to form.

"They got my gang." Karl whispers tremulously. "They got everyone, Quackity, Sapnap, Connor, Foolish, even Fundy, and I don't even care about Fundy."

One mystery solved, twelve-dozen more opened. "Who's they??"

"I don't know, some bastards-"

"Language!!"

"Some bitches in the lab we infiltrated!"

"You were infiltrating a lab?? WHY??" Puffy wants to scream.

"To take revenge on the people who made Ranboo and Techno!" Karl wails. "But now my friends are being held hostage!"

"Okay, okay, don't worry. We'll save them." Puffy reassures him, trying to resist from stressing him out with more questions. The most pressing one being Ranboo??? WTF???

Skeppy turns around. "Why'd you want revenge??"

"Skeppy." Puffy steeples her fingers. "With all due respect, who the hell funded these mutant experiments that seem to have been going on underneath your very nose?"

"I did, of course!" Skeppy laughs. "Mutants are cool, I like them, and Schlatt said I could have one!"

"Skeppy. They're people." Puffy can't believe she's been dragged into this. Better now than never, though.

Skeppy pouts and sulks, looking to Bad for reassurance. Bad just glares at him, disappointment evident in his eyes. "Puffy, you're my new Skeppy."

"Wait, what?"

"What?? You can't replace me, Bad!!"

"Fine. Discount Skeppy."

"Oh, well, that's much better." Puffy groans. "Why isn't the damn car moving?? Are we going to get help or not??"

"We're already here, Puffy!!"

"Well then, why the f*ck didn't you say so??"

"Language! I thought you were having fun playing detective!!" Puffy slams open the car door and storms out. She stops and stares at Niki and Jack as they sneak out the back door of the school with a remote detonator.

"What the f*ck is going on?? TECHNO!! PHIL!!" She bellows. The two appear in the main entrance, still holding their tea mugs.

"Oh, you're back."

Puffy storms up to them and upends both mugs with an angry gesture. "You are coming to the capital and saving the Ducklings whether you f*cking like it or not." She glares at both of them as they start to speak. "I don't want to hear a single word other than 'Yessir, Captain Puffy'."

"Yessir, Captain Puffy??" Philza echoes incredulously.

"Good enough." Puffy turns and runs after Niki and Jack. "Get back here, you scamps!"

"We wanted to blow up the school so that they don't take over the world!" Jack complains when Puffy catches up.

"Nobody is taking over the world." Puffy cries, exasperated. "Niki, you should know better!"

"I thought the explosions would be pretty." Niki smiles.

"Come on. You can blow up the school later, mkay? Right now we need to save some idiot kids."

"But we're kids, too!"

"You were about to blow up a school, I am not having this argument with you." Puffy storms back and finds the group of kids who'd been sparring with swords earlier. They're now practicing their shooting on soda cans. Tommy grins and waves at Puffy.

"Kids! We're all going to perform a rescue mission!" She's not exasperated. Was she ever? Or was it the roots of adventure blossoming into excitement?

The rumors that Captain Puffy was a pirate in a past life spread like wildfire the first time she saved a drowning kid in a pool. The rumors couldn't be further from the truth. She was a naval pirate in this life.

The mixture of teens and adults gather around and listen as Puffy outlines the plan. Skeppy, Bad, and Technoblade know the layout of the lab best, so they'll be leading teams.

"Skeppy, man, you'd better not betray us. These are kids' lives on the line."

"I could just-"

"Mm, mm, we don't trust government interference, we're doing this ourselves. No police, no secret agents, no whatever the f*ck you've got goin' on."

"Anarchy pog." Technoblade chuckles.

"Yes, yes, anarchy is very nice and all, now can we please focus."

Puffy writes the teams down on a piece of paper.

--Techno's team: Philza, Hannah, Tommy--

--Bad's team: George, Charlie, Jack, Niki--

--Skeppy's team: Antfrost, Wilbur, Puffy--

"Alright, I think this looks good, right?"

"Why are you splitting me and Wilbur up?" Tommy protests.

"Teams are final, no takebackseys." Puffy retorts, unwilling to admit she just put names down at random without thinking about it.

"Ha, she didn't split me and Niki up." Jack taunts Tommy.

"Into the van, everyone!"

"We have a bus." Philza notes. "The van is too small."

"Into the goddamn bus, everyone!" Captain Puffy barks, waving her hands wildly. "We haven't got a moment to lose!"

The teens chorus, "Yessir, Captain Puffy!!" And the adults reluctantly echo the sentiment. The moment hangs like brittle joy in the chilly evening air. A single disruption could ruin it.

"Let's go save some kids!!" Puffy leads the charge into the bus, stealing the driver's seat before anybody else can.

Lost in the empty schoolyard, the moment shatters, alone, but never forgotten.

Eret watches the bus drive off. She knows he wouldn't be welcome in the rescue mission, but it still hurts to be left behind. Sulking, they trudge into the woods.

The sound of voices floats through the trees. Eret perks up. Ranboo and Tubbo were left behind, as well, along with Ponk and Sam. She hesitates before striding in that direction.

She pauses as he reaches the glade that the four are passing through. Their banter fills the air beneath the cloudy sunset.

Watching from behind a tree, Eret sees Sam and Ponk laugh at the two boys' complaints. Ponk's face transforms into utter horror as a muffled thwoop makes Sam's body jolt. Sam laughs brittly, shock shutting him down as bright crimson leaks through his pale green shirt.

Ranboo screams for help as Tubbo lays Sam down and puts pressure on the wound. Ponk stares, stunned. Eret watches the scene unfold, unable to move her limbs, unable to make a sound. Another thwoop. Ponk staggers. Collapses. Blood. Tubbo barks orders at the panicking Ranboo.

She should help them. They need help. Eret tries to will her limbs to move.

Somene in a neon green cloak steps out from the opposite end of the glade. He holds a silenced revolver loosely in one hand. The mask over his face grins eerily down at the desperate teens and dying adults.

"Ranboo." He says in a mockingly gentle voice. "You don't get to defy me."

"I don't know who you are!" Ranboo cries. "Help us, someone shot them!"

"I did." The man gestures with his revolver. "I told you to bring me the neutralizer. Worse, you let Techno out of your sight, again! Where is he??"

"What neutralizer??" Tubbo cries. "Ranboo, what the hell is he talking about?? How do you know him??"

"I don't!! Dream, I don't know what happened, I don't- I don't remember." Ranboo flinches back as Dream shoves the revolver against Tubbo's head.

"Big man, please." Tubbo's desperate hiss breaks Eret's heart. There's nothing she can do. Everyone else is gone.

"Ranboo. I want you to remember right now. Smile." Dream says coldly.

Ranboo drops his head, seemingly in despair. Eret flinches back as wings unfold from growing cracks in his body, and eyes whisper tales of bloody vengeance as they open and peer every which way. Monster- Her scars twinge with half-recalled pain.

"Please don't kill him." Ranboo begs, so softly that Eret almost misses it. "I injected Techno with the neutralizer. I thought that's what you wanted."

"Hm." Dream muses. "Alright. Where is he, now?"

"I don't know."

"Find him, then."

Ranboo rises to a towering height of eight feet. He grips his head, trembling, nearly sobbing. "Please don't kill Tubbo."

"Track down Techno, and I won't."

"He's not here." Ranboo pleads. "He's not at the school anymore."

Dream raises the revolver and the black cutout eyes of the grinning mask stare directly at Eret. "You. Come out."

Eret walks slowly to their doom, shaking and terrified of the revolver aiming death at his head. "I know where they went." She says hastily. "They went to some lab in the capital!"

"Ahh. Back to his origins, hm." Dream turns back to Ranboo. "Alright. Come on. Leave them there." He gestures dismissively to the dying adults.

Ranboo and Tubbo follow Dream without looking at Eret. Eret stays frozen until he's sure the three have forgotten her, then they rush to Sam and Ponk.

"Hold on." She cries. "I'll get help."

"No-" Ponk moans. "Warn them, man. Warn Philza. Dream's a bad guy. Save the kids."

"I can't just let you die!" Eret wails, pressing her hands to the gunshot wounds in a vain attempt to stem the flows of blood.

"Sorry, kid." Sam smiles gently at her. "We're already dead."

"No, you're f*cking not." Eret grabs Tubbo's backpack and rummages around desperately. Bandages. Lots of them. They crisscross each man's wounds with as many bandages they can, then grab Tubbo's water canteen and help the two drink some. "Stay here. I'll come back." She warns them, and then grabs the smoke grenade in the back pocket and runs.

The van that Bad came in is still in front of the school, with the keys still inside, and the gps still set to the capital city. Eret yanks it into drive. She has to get to the lab before Dream.

Inside the laboratory, Quackity taps codes against the glass wall of his cage. Sapnap taps back. Outside the cages, Schlatt dresses down one of his assistants who came to clean HBomb's body off the floor.

Sapnap taps to Quackity, >>You good?<<

Quackity taps back, >>f*ck no. You?<<

>>No. But Karl escaped.<<

>>He'll get help.<< Quackity reassures Sapnap.

"f*cking hell, stop that infernal racket!! Damn kids." Schlatt snarls and gulps down more whiskey.

"Asshole." Quackity snarls back. "If you didn't capture us, we wouldn't be annoying you right now."

"I could cut out your voice box and take your fingers, then you wouldn't f*cking annoy me." Schlatt smashes the bottle against Quackity's cage.

"You're going to f*cking pay for all your evil and all the pain you've inflicted on people!"

"Ha!" Schlatt chuckles. "Don't tell me you think Techno is a person."

"He is!" Quackity cries.

"Even after he killed so many people?? Even after he's torn down so many livelihoods??"

"Technoblade killed my parents." Quackity admits. "He destroyed them because they were monarchs. I hate him for that. But he's still a person."

"Don't you want him to hurt how he hurt you, Quackity?" Schlatt asks, sounding almost sincere. "Don't you want to crush him?"

"I want to kill him!" Quackity slams a fist against the glass. "But what you've done- what you're doing is cruel and unusual! Nobody deserves it! And we're just kids, we certainly don't deserve whatever the f*ck you're planning to do to us! This is illegal and immoral!"

Schlatt laughs. "Okay, kid. But consider this, I've got all the money. I'm safe from whatever laws you think I'm breaking. I've got the goverment in my pocketbook. And as for immoral?? Ha, morality is f*cking relative, you little f*ck. For me, it's a completely good thing that I'm getting more money outta this. Do you know how many people want mutants? A sh*tton. So don't even try."

"You can't escape consequences for your f*cking actions!! You will die, Schlatt, I swear to God, you will die slowly and I will laugh as you beg for mercy."

"See? A lot of people would say that's immoral." Schlatt grins. "You just proved my point. Why whine about it?"

"You're obfuscating the f*cking issue, Schlatt!" Quackity retorts. "You're harming us, you're harming so many people, and we're not going to just sit idly by while you play around with semantics!"

"I'm going to f*cking kill you if you don't shut your goddamn mouth." Schlatt snaps. "You will never see me die. But I'll see you suffer."

"Nah, that's where you're wrong, pal." Techno-- in all his mutant chrysaor glory-- shifts into view behind Schlatt, who freezes, abject terror paling his face. "I think I like Quackity's idea better. Much more entertaining."

The point of a sword emerges from Schlatt's gut. Techno twists the blade and Schlatt lets out a hiss of agony. Philza drops from the ceiling. "How do I open these, mate?"

"The password is right there on the sticky notes!" Quackity answers, tears running freely down his cheeks. The security guards in the door drop to the floor. Rose and Tommy step over them, fistbumping each other.

The cages swing open and Quackity shakes Steve awake to escape. Sapnap drags him and Steve both into a fluffy hug. Foolish and Connor bawl as Rose hugs them both.

Quackity extricates himself from the embrace and storms over to Schlatt, who lies bleeding on the floor as Techno stands over him. "I want the sword."

"Don't let him have it, Techno." Philza calls.

"f*cking gimme." Quackity holds out his hand, glaring at Techno. "I want to kill the motherf*cker and make sure he stays f*cking dead."

"He's about to die anyway." Techno replies, but hands the sword over. "Here. Practice for killing me."

Quackity gives Techno a grim smile. "Exactly." He takes the sword and presses the point over where he thinks Schlatt's heart is.

Techno makes a snorting noise. "Not there, that's just his lung. Here." He directs Quackity's trembling hands to press the blade over Schlatt's heart.

Quackity takes a deep breath and scowls into Schlatt's wide, pleading eyes. For a moment, he's frozen by inhibition, natural unwillingness to take a life.

The moment passes and the hatred inside him turns his limbs to fluid, powerful fire. Quackity drives the sword home. He twists the blade with bitter vengeance, and sees the light fade from Schlatt's eyes.

Technoblade takes the sword gently from Quackity. Sapnap hugs him from behind. Quackity just stares down at the man he just killed. He doesn't feel dirty. He doesn't feel amazing, either. Schlatt deserved to die, and so Quackity killed him. The simple facts unleash fierce catharsis, which pours burning from his eyes and wracks his body with sobs.

"Now look what you've done." Philza reproaches Techno. "He wasn't ready."

Quackity continues to sob, relieved that his friends are all safe, confusingly so very happy that Techno came to save him, and even more confused about what the hell he should be feeling after just killing an evil man. Techno shuffles uncomfortably, raising his arms in a wide, helpless shrug. "It's good practice?" He defends himself weakly against Philza's scowl. "He wants to kill me, so he was going to have to confront this eventually."

Quackity pounces at Techno, who yelps and stumbles back, shifting to human form and nearly crashing into the wall. Quackity wraps his arms around the terrorist and hugs him tightly. "I hate you so goddamn much." He snarls tearfully.

"Good work, Quackity." Techno replies, sounding almost fond as he awkwardly pats Quackity's back. "If anybody's gonna kill me in the end, it'll be you."

"Damn right it'll be me." Quackity lets go and backs away, wiping his eyes and sniffling.

"Hm, am I interrupting family bonding time?" An unfamiliar voice chuckles from the doorway.

Quackity spins to glower at whoever spoke. "We're not a f*cking family!"

The grinning mask stares him down. Ranboo and Tubbo quail behind the man, clearly hostages. Quackity wants the sword back.

Eret falls from a grate in the ceiling. "Dream is coming!" He shouts into the taut silence, and crashes into the floor.

Chapter 12: Till Death Do Us Part

Chapter Text

Dream laughs in the silence left by Eret's too-late warning. Eret hops up and blushes, embarrassed. "Oh. Damn." He scrambles to join the scattered group across the room from Dream.

Technoblade strides to the center of the room, polishing the blood from his sword with a kerchief. In his weakened state, he looks so frail. "Dream, let them go."

"Hmm." Dream taps a finger to his mask, smiling beneath it. "No. I think not."

Technoblade is helpless. Weak. He doesn't have his immortality, he doesn't have regeneration, he has nothing. Dream has all the cards.

"C'mon, man, those are my students. I can't have you traumatizing them." Technoblade smiles, his tone light and dry. But Dream imagines he must be squirming beneath his facade.

"Why not?"

"I just told you, man, c'mon, let the kids go and we can talk like adults."

"Doesn't this bring back memories, Techno?" Dream grins and presses his revolver to Tubbo's head. He enjoys Ranboo's flinch, Tubbo's whimper, the wide-eyed horror of their fellow students. "C'mon, Techno. You remember, don't you?"

Technoblade sags tiredly. "Dream, I never forgot."

"Good." Dream bares his teeth, holding back delighted tears despite his expressions being hidden. "Tell them. Tell them all what you turned me into."

"Dude, I never turned you into anything, I've told you-" Technoblade tries to protest, but Dream co*cks the revolver, shutting him up.

"Choose your next words wisely, Technoblade." He hisses.

Technoblade lays down his sword and raises his hands. "Look, you want me, right? You want revenge? Go ahead, I'm yours. Just let the kids go."

"I want Philza, too." Dream knows Techno will never let Philza come to harm. Whatever will he do when it comes down to this choice between his students and his best friend, haha. But Technoblade only scowls at him and doesn't answer. "Tell them." Dream orders, growing impatient.

"The truth, or your version?" Technoblade's sass gets on Dream's nerves. He raises the revolver and fires for one of the students.

Night-black and death-white blocks the bullet's path. Ranboo grits his teeth as the wound knits itself together. "I- I can't let you do that, Dream."

"Ranboo. You're really going to defy me now?" Dream laughs, then yelps as Tubbo kicks him and knocks the gun from his grip.

Upon escaping, Tubbo moves to stand by Ranboo. Quackity snatches the sword from the floor and stands in front of Technoblade, who makes a confused, "Heh?? Quackity, uh, you want me dead, right? It's a win-win if you let Dream have me."

"I'm not letting this motherf*cking bitch steal my kill." Quackity retorts.

Philza moves to a clear part of the room in front of Ranboo and Tubbo, extending his combat wings. "Techno. Let me take care of this bastard."

"Ranboo, Smile!" Dream laughs at these idiots. "Kill all of them except Technoblade!"

Ranboo trembles, clenching his fists. "I don't want to. Please don't make me."

"Ranboo, do you know what Technoblade is?"

Ranboo gives Technoblade a desperate look.

"He's a bomb. A living bomb. The most powerful bomb, in fact, to have ever been created by morons like Schlatt and HBomb! Except Schlatt didn't create him. I did. I created him with one purpose. To destroy the world."

"What?? And you expect us to hate Technoblade for your actions?? That's f*cking bullsh*t." Philza snarls.

"But then, something went wrong." Dream enjoys telling the bitter story. "Technoblade broke free. He went on a rampage, killing most of the scientists and assistants, many of whom were completely innocent of the experiments!"

Dream reaches for his mask. "He even hunted down the lead scientist. He confronted this man in the deepest core of the laboratory complex. Not this building. Haha, we have so many labs! You can't even take down one!"

"Get on with it." Technoblade growls.

"Haha, you wanna know why I want Technoblade??" Dream removes his mask. Plasma swirls across his skin, blazing in his veins, exploding from his eyes and mouth. "I want to make him suffer the same way I've suffered for years!"

"You fool." Technoblade sighs. "I didn't force you to do this to yourself."

"Oh, but you did!! You threatened my life! You forced me to take steps to ensure I would never die! Ever! And now my life is a living hell because of you!" Dream snarls, re-securing his mask so that the pain subsides to a dull roar.

Quackity charges, slashing at Dream with the sword. Dream melts around the blade and reforms again, tutting mockingly. "I just told you I can't be killed."

"I needed to test it." Quackity retorts.

"That's the problem with all you humans! You're always so unwilling to believe what your god tells you!"

Quackity slashes at him again. "You are not a f*cking god!"

"It doesn't even work!! Haha, you can't kill me! You're all powerless against me!!"

"Look, Dream, buddy, I don't know what you want from me. That lab is long gone. Whatever you used on yourself is destroyed."

"I want you to end the world, Techno." Dream laughs. "And I want you to stare into the destruction you caused and I want you to suffer, because all your loved ones, everyone you ever cared about, they are all dead!!"

"That- gonna be honest, Dream, that's a bit disproportionate." The very next second, Technoblade gets distracted by petting the polar bear nuzzling his arm.

"Mate, sounds like your suffering is all on you." Philza crosses his arms, his wings folding slightly.

"Yeah, I don't want the end of the world, man." Ranboo agrees. "I thought you just wanted the threat to end, not, like, to exacerbate the threat."

"This is your fault, too, Ranboo!" Dream cries. He is in control. He is. He has to be. "You tried to defy me, you tried to ruin things!!"

"What? I- I don't even know what you mean, man, I just stopped him from dying, and, uh, the neutralizer,which was kinda temporary anyway!" Ranboo wilts as Philza shoots him with a stern we'll talk later kind of look. "I didn't hurt anyone, and I don't want to hurt anyone, and you can't make me!"

"How do you know I can't?"

Ranboo stands straight, eyes fiery with bravery. "Because, despite everything, I'm still me! You can't make me do something I wouldn't do anyway, even with whatever conditioning you're on about! How do I know you're not lying about that, anyway?"

Dream shoots. Ranboo catches the bullet in his arm before it can hit Tubbo. Dream shoots again, at Quackity. Again, Ranboo stops it. "Ranboo, I'm going to kill your friends if you don't listen to me!"

"You can try." Ranboo snaps back. "You were going to make me kill them, anyway. I think I can take you."

Dream aims for Technoblade and fires his last bullet. The bullet he put in there specifically for Ranboo in case of defiance.

Ranboo doesn't hesitate. Why would he? He doesn't know what's in the bullet. He doesn't want Technoblade to die, unlike his classmates.

Ranboo takes the bullet in his chest and curls in on himself, keening.

"It hurts, doesn't it." Dream laughs. He is in control.

"What the f*ck did you do to him??" Quackity snarls and attacks Dream, slashing ineffectually with Techno's sword.

"Stand down, or I won't cure him." Dream smiles as Quackity obediently tosses the sword to the floor. He is in control.

Sobbing, Ranboo trembles violently as veins of plasma leak through his blood, wrapping around his bones. Technoblade supports him from collapsing to the floor, setting him gently down.

Philza snarls, "f*cking cure him, buddy." But Dream can see how shaken the old man is.

"Hm. Technoblade. I want you to beg." Dream grins and snaps his fingers, pointing to the floor in front of himself. "Kneel before your god and beg for that boy's life."

Dream doesn't really care about making Techno beg. It may be a power trip to have the once-strong terrorist pleading for the life of another human at his feet, but that's not the point. Dream wants Techno to refuse. He wants all Technoblade's students, and even Philza, to realize that Technoblade is a selfish, proud man. He wants their illusions to be shattered, and then he wants them to do his work for him.

"Techno." Philza murmurs.

"I could inflict that same pain on you, Technoblade." Dream taunts, dangling the illusion of choice before his prey. "Just beg me for it. Beg me for this agony, and I will ease Ranboo's suffering and give it all to you instead."

Technoblade rises. "I've got a better idea." His voice is a ragged growl. "Why don't you burn in hell."

"Oh! You're not going to sacrifice yourself??" Dream cries in mock astonishment, delighted.

"This isn't about sacrifice, Dream." Technoblade strides for him, so small in his Human form. "This is about power."

"T-Techno-" Quackity sounds broken, confused. Good.

"Quiet." Techno shuts him down without a second's hesitation. Dream can't help but admire the monster's committment to the role. "My turn."

"Ahh, Technoblade, you want power. Of course! I can give it to you."

"Nah." Technoblade leans on his heels, hands casually in his pockets. "You see, Dream, you talk big. You say things like sacrifice, and revenge, and you shift the blame onto others. But all I hear is, you want power over people. And see, the thing is, I don't think you really want to end the world. You just want to rule it."

Dream laughs, in control, because why wouldn't he be?? He has to be.

Technoblade continues, an iron gleam in his eyes. "And you see, Dream, the thing about ruling the world... well, that goes against everything I stand for, doesn't it."

"What's your point, Techno? I have Ranboo at my mercy. I have all of you at my mercy. Go ahead, try to kill me, but it won't work! Because I'm god!"

"Gods are inherently heirarchical concepts." Technoblade bares his teeth. "I'm an atheist."

"That- that doesn't solve anything, Techno! I'm still in control!"

"Are you?"

"Yes!!"

"Or have I just been distracting you this whole time?" Technoblade smirks. And then he shifts.

Dozens of wings billow out in fractalized cracks across the bristly hide of the boar-like humanoid now snorting and pawing the ground. Dream quails at the sight of Technoblade's fully demonic form. "I thought you couldn't-"

"You see, Dream." Technoblade's voice resonates against the walls, echoing out behind Dream into the hallways. "You just gave away one vital detail."

"What- what's that?" Dream backpedals as Technoblade strides for him.

"You're afraid of me." Technoblade shoves Dream into the wall, his claws coming so close to slicing through Dream's molten skin. "And if you're afraid of me, that means I can hurt you."

"Wait- wait, Techno, haha-" Dream chokes on terror and burning pain as Techno presses one talon into his shoulder.

"Heal Ranboo." Technoblade orders in a growl. "Heal him or I torture you for days before finding a volcano and chaining you in the magma."

The cold sincerity in his tone tells Dream Technoblade won't hesitate to make good on his threat. "I- I will! I will!" Dream whimpers.

"Good." Technoblade drops Dream and steps back. "Do it."

Dream's hands shake as he finds the antidote in his cloak pockets. "Antidote, here."

"If this doesn't cure him, you know exactly what I'm going to do to you." Technoblade warns as he hands the antidote to Philza. Dream laughs nervously, shrinking towards the door. If he can flee down the hall-

"Don't even f*cking think about running." Quackity threatens Dream with a revolver.

"Ha, you think that can hurt me?"

"I know it will."

Dream hesitates, uncertain. It's entirely possible that they found something in the lab that could indeed hurt, possibly even kill, him. "You wouldn't."

"f*cking try me." Quackity bares his teeth in a furious, merciless grin. "You're gonna pay for what you've done."

Dream raises his hands, unwilling to test Quackity's threat just yet. Philza helps Ranboo sit up as the teen recovers. Technoblade crosses his arms, smiling, his gleaming tusks sharp and curved. "Go ahead. See if any of them will help you. See how much power you have here."

Dream looks around the room for someone he can twist to his will, someone who will bend and break and dance at his whim. "C-Connor!" He greets the sullen teen in a jovial, friendly tone. "You wouldn't want-"

"Shut the f*ck up." Connor scowls at him.

"They're lying, Connor!" Dream wheedles. He flinches back as Quackity takes a step towards him with the gun that could either be useless or very bad indeed.

Connor shrugs. "They're my friends."

"So you don't care that Ranboo has been betraying all of you from day one?"

"Shut your f*cking pie hole." Tommy snarls. "We'll deal with him ourselves. You can stay the f*ck away from us." Tubbo nods vigorously in agreement, clinging to Tommy's arm and shooting venomous death-glares at Dream.

Dream turns to the weakest link. "Eret, they all abandoned you, ignored you. Help me and I'll be your friend. I'll pay you so much, too, you want money? I've got money."

Eret spits at him. "They may hate me for what I've done, but I'm not making the same damn mistake twice."

"I don't hate you, Eret." Tommy punches Eret's shoulder lightly.

"You are all idiots." Dream snaps. "Don't you realize how f*cked up this is? You're protecting a literal terrorist! Two of them! Along with, let's see, a mutant sleeper agent, a traitor who tried to hold some of you hostage, and a newly minted murderer! Quackity just murdered Schlatt! How are none of you bothered by any of this??"

Tommy shrugs. "I mean, you're all glowy and playing god, so I don't see how you can f*cking judge us for adapting. You're just as- no, you're more f*cked up."

"Quackity, you killed a man." Dream ignores Tommy. Dream has to be in control. He is in control. He is. Really.

Quackity shrugs. "He was evil. I'm over it. And we're not protecting Technoblade. I'm gonna kill him at the end of the school year."

"Really?? Why don't you help me kill him right now??"

"No can do." Quackity grins sharply. "But I can help him kill you, motherf*cker. That seems like a much better idea."

"Ranboo." Dream turns to his puppet, his dog, his loyal servant. "Ranboo, you helped me so much, you've been so good so far, why rebel now?"

Ranboo gives Dream a silent death-stare, mirroring the look currently occupying Technoblade's monstrous face. Dream takes a step back, further through the door.

"Dream, you bastard!!" The achingly familiar voice blindsides Dream from behind.

"George??" He spins around, only to flinch back into the room as George throws a vicious punch.

"Get'im, George!" A woman's voice cries.

"N-no, George, it's me, Dream!" Dream cries, dodging another blow. "George-"

"You hurt Antfrost!" George snarls.

"He was in my way, haha! I can heal him, though! I can heal anyone you want, just help me!"

"Never."

Dream lets George's next punch land. George yelps and backs away in shock. "I'm a god, now, George. It can be like old days. You, and Bad, and Antfrost. We can all have fun again, all together again."

"Dream, that ain't happenin'." The woman steps forward, clouds of rainbow-dyed hair billowing over her shoulder. "You're goin' down. I'm Captain Puffy, by the way. Just so you know all our names. Cause one of us is gonna kill you, and it could very well be me."

An explosion rocks the back of the room. The wall shatters, and Niki and Jack step through the hole, followed by Wilbur, Charlie, and the limping Antfrost. Jack laughs maniacally. "Come on, assholes, we're saving you!"

Niki fistbumps him. "And then we're exploding the school!!"

"No!!" Puffy cries. "No exploding the school!"

"I told them they could." Wilbur replies, flipping his hair out of his eyes. "Me and Charlie will help, of course. It's all planned out. All schools must go."

"We're like anarchists, except only for schools!" Charlie cheers.

Puffy groans. "Ugh, fine, but you'd better make sure nobody is inside!!"

While nobody seems to be paying attention to him, Dream attempts to sneak out the door. A hornet stings his neck. Or a dart. Probably a dart. Dream flinches and glances back at Quackity, who reloads the revolver.

He doesn't feel any different though. So it was a bluff. He ducks into the hall and flees.

"Should we just let him go?" Puffy asks, staring at the empty doorway. Bad and George shake their heads and chase after Dream. Puffy hesitates, then follows. Antfrost limps hastily after them.

Quackity checks the darts he still has in the gun. Fundy found them, and he has no idea what any of them do. "Techno, are you still immortal?"

Technoblade shares a look with Philza. "Afraid so. The neutralizing agent was just meant to subdue me enough so I could be captured."

"So we still have that problem." Quackity muses. "Forget Dream for now. Let's find a f*cking cure for the f*cking mutant bomb. Wilbur! You know about chemicals, what do any of these mean??"

"I do, too." Rose volunteers. Fundy shows off his collection of chemicals he gathered from all around the lab while Dream wasn't looking.

Fundy hovers as Wilbur and Rose examine and argue over the different compositions. Quackity turns to check on his gang and his friends. "Everyone okay?"

Sapnap and the Ducklings-- Foolish, Karl, and Connor-- reply in the affirmative, each saluting their leader with handshakes-turned-hugs. Technoblade ignores the question, crouched beside Steve as he brushes his claws through the bear's fur.

Philza helps Ranboo stand up and gives him a kerchief to wipe the blood from his mouth. Tommy and Tubbo argue beside Ranboo over the best method of dismembering Dream. Niki and Jack banter with Charlie. Eret remains in the corner, watching with a soft, sad smile on his face.

Everyone is okay. That's what matters, for now.

Chapter 13: Roam With Me

Chapter Text

Screams echoed through the night. Quackity cowered in his bed, muffling his frightened sobs in his blankets. Heavy steps stopped at his door. The hinges creaked softly and Quackity flinched from the light pouring over him.

The man gazed coldly at him, a bloody sword held loosely in one hand. "Run." The gruff command jolted Quackity into motion. He rolled out of bed and scrambled for the window. Dropping to the ground, he curled into a ball in the bushes and tried to control his panicked breathing. It's just a bad dream, it's just a bad dream-

"You took care of the little prince, right, Techno?" Another voice filtered from the open window.

"Yep."

Quackity remained hidden in the bushes until the mansion started to crackle and burn down.

The jolt of the bus as it stops in the schoolyard shakes Quackity free from the bitter memory. Philza was there, too, on that day when Quackity's life was shattered.

Philza would have killed Quackity if he'd been the one to find him. But Technoblade has always been the face of that destructive night. Whenever nightmares twist the recollection, it's always Techno hunting him down.

Most of the other students whoop and holler as they leap from the bus into the schoolyard. Quackity gives Sapnap a gentle shove and a smile to encourage him to go on ahead. Ranboo remains asleep in the back seat with Tubbo and Tommy whispering around him. Puffy follows the kids, shouting at Wilbur to stop juggling cherry bombs.

Philza sighs in fond exasperation and stomps out; whether to help Puffy or laugh at her suffering will be decided by the flip of a whimsical coin. Quackity watches Technoblade as the former terrorist rises and starts to limp down the aisle, leading Steve behind him.

Technoblade pauses by Quackity's seat and frowns at the teen, somehow managing to be intimidating even in his frail human state. "You dragged everyone into danger today, Quackity. Don't try that again."

Quackity nods, bashfully grumbling, "Thanks for saving us."

"No problem." Techno's lying, Quackity knows, he's lying by being polite. He's lost his immortality, he's going to lose his life, and he could have lost Philza today. It's natural that he'd be upset. So why isn't he acting angrier??

"Why did you save us??" Quackity stands up and glares defiantly into the face of the night that destroyed his life. "You could've left us all to die, you could've run away so many times, you had so many chances to kill any or all of us, but you've never even hurt one of us!" Why didn't you kill me is left unsaid, but it roars from his eyes nonetheless.

The only sign that the interrogation has taken Techno aback is a slight sigh. "Quackity, I never hated any of you."

Quackity stares at him as the meaning slashes through his heart. "You care about us, Techno?"

"I- I never said that, you're all my kids- my students, it's not like I can just let you die, I'd be a terrible teacher if I did that." Techno flusters, twisting his braid in his fingers and glaring. His protestations only dig his grave deeper.

"Ha, liar! You f*cking care about us!" Quackity crows sad*stically.

"Shut up, Quackity." Techno tosses his braid over his shoulder and tries to leave with his dignity intact. "Come on, Steve." Steve nuzzles Techno's hand with a low rumble, and all remaining dignity melts.

Quackity leaps over the seats, leaving Techno to pet and croon over the polar bear.

In the orange rays of the sunset, Sam and Ponk lay out on the grass as Captain Puffy sews up their wounds and Eret hovers nervously. The Ducklings have set up tents for camping. Wilbur, Niki, and Jack emerge from the school building with matching smirks and a countdown, utilized by them randomly shouting a number. Fundy paces, examining the chemicals he stole from the lab.

Quackity watches his world move on until the sun goes down and the bonfire of the school flickers and dances.

He watches his world move on in the stars as Techno sits on a log between Steve and Philza. Ranboo braids Phil's hair, a new, hedgehog-decorated notebook in his lap. Tubbo and Tommy chase Wilbur for some slight.

Sapnap sits beside Quackity as the moon rises, casting a silver light over the trees and the tents. "You good?"

"Yeah."

Forgiveness doesn't have to feel like the end. Sometimes it's a new beginning.

Staring up at the twinkling stars, Dream wondered, "Do you think they care about us?"

George gave him a fond look of confusion. "Dream, they're not alive."

"How do we know?"

"I think the stars care." Bad piped up, braiding Skeppy's hair as Antfrost napped on a log. The campfire crackled and sent glowing ashes dancing through the air.

"Why?" George laughed. "They're stars."

"They have to watch, though, don't they." Bad said. "They watch us as we rise, and we fall, and we break and-"

"And we make our mistakes." Dream finished the lyrics, then laughed. "Do you think the stars are gods?"

"Gods of ages past, maybe." Bad mused. "Maybe we'll become stars someday. Maybe we'll learn to care like they do."

George stared up at the cold, apathetic stars. "Did you ever care?" George asked. Dream, chained to a tree, and muzzled, gave him a sullen scowl. "Dream, did you want to become a star?"

Dream dropped his eyes, scuffing the damp ground. There's nobody else around for miles. The Hunters had what they needed to permanently get rid of Dream. Or heal him.

"What was it like, Dream? Being a star? Did you care more?" George begged for an answer. It hurt him to see his former friend like this.

"George." Dream said in a reproachful tone. "What do you think?"

"I think you stopped caring a long time ago." George frowned. "I think becoming a star only helped you distance yourself even more."

Dream sighed. "I cared about you."

"You never came back."

"I was preoccupied. I wanted to come back for you, I did."

Bad and Antfrost snored in their tents. Rain pattered on the leaves. The hot droplets dripped down George's cheeks.

"We can't let you go. You know that, right? You've done bad things."

"So has Techno, but you didn't hunt him down." Dream grumbled.

"You know we're not- we're not exactly professionals. We've only ever been good at tracking each other." George laughed bitterly. "But we're not going to kill you, Dream. I can't- I can't let them kill you."

"Why?" Dream asked sullenly.

"Because I want my friend back. We'll find a way, Dream." George promised, steel in his voice and fire in his eyes.

Laughter, crisp and broken, rang out from the trees. Dream laughed and laughed until he was sobbing, sobbed and sobbed until he was screaming.

The blood on his hands belonged to his former friends. He could've never let them die to anyone else. He had to kill them. They were in his way. They took his immortality from him, and he can never forgive that.

Dream screamed to the heavens. He dared God to strike him down. He begged for somebody, anybody, to end his miserable life.

But nobody came.

Nobody came...

...Skeppy stood in the way, hatred and grief pooling in his eyes.

One crack. Two cracks. The forest went still and silent. Dream crumpled, alone, in a glade.

Skeppy dug a grave for Bad, George, and Antfrost. He knelt over it, weeping.

One crack.

Karl flips through the scenes, smiling fondly at the emotions curling in elegant scripts across the paper.

When the end of the year came, the students refused to kill Technoblade. He retired with Philza, Steve, and Ranboo to a remote tundra. Karl chuckles. Some things never change.

Quackity and Sapnap became professional bounty hunters after claiming the bounty for killing Technoblade. They turned in his sheared-off braid as proof. Nobody questioned it.

After her school was burned down by her students, Captain Puffy decided enough was enough and took to the seas to become a pirate again. She kidnapped Foolish as her first mate. Hannah Rose, Connor, and Charlie tagged along.

Fundy became a private investigator and Quackity's friendly rival.

Niki and Jack started a bakery called Explosive Cakes.

Ponk and Sam adopted several kids and accidentally started an anarchist commune together.

Tubbo spearheaded a revolution. His right-hand man was Tommy, closely followed by Wilbur and Eret. Karl's smile grows bittersweet. Some things never change.

Karl hesitates, lingering on the last pages. His own life in this universe was unremarkable. But isn't that his place? He's not a butterfly, fated to alter the worlds he's thrown into. He's a star, watching, detached, unable to affect anything.

Karl closes the book and inscribes the title in flourishing calligraphy:

Korosensei Never Dies - By Karl Jacobs